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There’s help for women who can’t achieve orgasm


Sexual health is the ability to embrace and enjoy our sexuality throughout our lives. It is an important part of our physical and emotional health. The act of sex itself has been shown to promote; better sleep habits, less stress, and more happiness. Our bodies thrive on the chemicals released during orgasm so a healthy sex life is indeed part of a healthy body.

Orgasmic dysfunction is the inhibition of the orgasmic phase of the sexual response cycle. Simply put, it is the inability to ‘come’ during sexual act with your partner and it is a problem most women and very few men encounter. If a woman has never had an orgasm in life, this is known as Primary Orgasmic Dysfunction. If she has been able to climax in the past, but currently unable to achieve orgasms, this is known as Secondary Orgasmic Dysfunction. Unfortunately, most women do not achieve orgasms as easily as the men. Mostly all men climax without difficulty, but for the woman, it is the exception to always reach orgasm and not the norm.

If you are a woman and you don’t climax easily, please don’t feel like there is something wrong with you or that you may be doing something wrong. Women often blame themselves or their spouses for lousy techniques as the cause of this anorgasmia, and men on the other hand blame their spouses for being too rigid and stiff and unresponsive during intercourse and hence the inability to have orgasms. Though this may be true and is sometimes the case, there is a need to explore other medical and psychological causes before playing the blame game with your spouse.


Research has shown that only about 10% -15% of women experience orgasm easily during sexual intercourse so this in fact normal. Some may ask, what exactly is wrong? Why is this the case? There may be so many reasons which I would discuss briefly such as previous negative sexual encounters, female anatomy, current medications, current mental state etc. But the simple answer is that women are wired differently than men.

First, the female anatomy plays a major part in orgasmic dysfunction. There is a big difference between the male anatomy and the female anatomy and this makes a difference when it comes to sexuality and achieving orgasms. A man’s most sensitive nerves are just below the tip of the penis and that is the most stimulated part during intercourse whereas for the woman, the most sensitive part is the clitoris, which is outside and above the vagina and hardly stimulated during regular vaginal intercourse. This is the reason men usually have a wonderful time during sexual intercourse, when the woman may be thinking about what she’ll cook for dinner or whether the children have finished their homework. This is the sad reality.

Secondly, there are some medical conditions such as hypertension, multiple sclerosis, diabetes etc. that affect blood flow and nerve supply to the pelvis. These chronic conditions do affect responsiveness within the pelvic region and would ultimately cause orgasmic dysfunction. Hormonal deficiency that occurs in women, especially after menopause may also be a reason for lack of orgasms. Estrogen is a female hormone that is responsible for vaginal lubrication, female sensuality, and responsiveness, and when there is decline in estrogen, women start to experience vaginal dryness, vaginal atrophy, unresponsiveness and all these lead to female orgasmic dysfunction.

When the orgasmic dysfunction is a recent problem, it is important to review all your medications with your doctor. There are certain medications such as anti-hypertensive drugs and anti-depressants that are responsible for orgasmic dysfunction and this may be the cause of the problem. Sexual response requires the mind and the body functioning together. Most times, there may be an underlying chronic case of depression, anxiety or stress, or an event that has taken place such as previous sexual abuse or painful sex that affects our mental state of being and this in turn affects our minds during sex and affects the ability to reach orgasm. In addition to all these, excessive alcohol intake, cigarette smoking, lack of exercise also cause health problems for our body which directly or indirectly affect us during sexual activity and ultimately cause orgasmic dysfunction.

Whatever the cause of this orgasmic dysfunction, people are becoming more vocal about it and are now identifying it as a serious health concern. Hence, several treatment options are now available to treat the it depending on the cause. If the orgasmic dysfunction is due to an underlying medical condition such as diabetes, it is important to treat the underlying illness first because that usually resolves the issue of anorgasmia. Also, if you are suffering from orgasmic dysfunction, inform your doctor about all medications that you are currently on, including non- prescription drugs because sometimes, the medicines we take can be the reason for lack of responsiveness during sexual activity.


Certain medications targeted at increasing libido and sensation are currently being used. It is advisable to talk to your doctor or a licensed sex therapist about which medication would be suitable for you. Hormone replacement drugs have successfully been used to treat orgasmic dysfunction due to estrogen decline. There is also something known as ‘scream cream’ which has been used to successfully treat anorgasmia. Scream cream is a combination of topical medication which when applied to the clitoris or external genitalia can increase blood flow and increase sensitivity to promote orgasms. O-shot is another recent procedure that has also been used to achieve more orgasms. This O-shot is not a drug but a procedure that is performed at the doctor’s office. It involves injecting blood platelets into vaginal tissue to increase sexual response.

In conclusion, there are a few medically-approved pelvic electrical stimulating devices that help stimulate the pelvic muscles to help reach climax. If all these treatment options have been tried with no success, it is strongly advised to undergo couples counseling or sex therapy sessions to help resolve any issues that may be going on in the relationship/marriage. Treatment for orgasmic dysfunction has been successful in about 70-80 % of cases when treated by a professional. Having a healthy sex life is very important to overall well-being and it is not something to be ashamed of. Talk to your doctor today if you or your partner currently have orgasmic dysfunction, as one of these treatment options may be right for you.

Disclaimer: The medical information provided on here by Dr. Nini Iyizoba is provided as an information resource only. This information does not create any patient-physician relationship and should not be used as a substitute for professional diagnosis and treatment




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