Stop worrying about decision making
In life we have choices. It is easy to say that we can be decisive when it comes to making decisions, however, when you are experiencing that feeling of being indecisive, it’s good to know that we have choices that can help us decide and make a decision or decisions.
Recently I went through a short period of being rather indecisive; I spent time worrying about all sorts and possibly irritated some people by always wanting their opinions. However, I have come to realize it probably stemmed from thinking about and wanting to do more than one thing almost all at the same time… It is said that “women tend to be more anxious and worry more than men”, so I guess that would make me “normal” right? Yes! One less thing to worry about J
This experience helped me realize that there are people who actually suffer with over worrying. They worry not only about making wrong decisions, but also regret decisions they make or have made… They worry about worrying which ends up undermining their confidence and in some cases it has led to stress, anxiety and depression. It’s good to know that there are solutions…. And remember, we do have choices.
Sometimes you may find it difficult to make a decision over things like, for example, should you make pasta or rice for dinner? Should I write up that report before dinner or after dinner? You then possibly start to stress about this, your heart starts racing, your head is racing, and you start breaking out into a sweat and feeling tense having worked yourself up into an anxious state. This is when you would find it useful to put into action the choices you have that can help you remain relaxed about making that decision or decisions.
Firstly you can focus on taking a few slow deep breathes in and out. This helps to calm you down and put you in a relaxed frame of mind mentally and physically too, helping you feel less threatened of making a decision.
Now that you have calmed down, get yourself a pen and paper and write down the pros and cons, keeping in mind the long and short term effects of any decision you have made. When you can see on paper what you are thinking, it helps make it easier to figure out what you can deal with and work on and come to a decision.
Don’t try to take large steps but instead take little ones that initially allow you to make daily decisions that you can stick to. This way, you allow yourself to act on the decision you are making and in turn build up your confidence thus improve upon your ability to act on the decision you make and not worry if it does not work out as you become aware that you could always make another if need be.
Don’t be pressured into making a decision; think for yourself. Ask yourself if you are making your decision based on pleasing others and doing what it is they feel you should do, or what they want to do? Have you made your decision just because you want to keep everyone else happy? Sometimes you may find you have loads of ideas that come to mind all at once and you need to follow your gut instinct when making a decision. Such a moment can become confusing but you need to make a decision about which direction to take; when this happens, you begin to wonder which direction would be best to take. Empower yourself and be wise and choose the option that is best for you and not others. You want whatever decision you make to be stress free.
There will be times in our lives when you may make or shall have to make decisions you don’t like or even want to make in the first instance, but don’t beat yourself up about it when you do find yourself in such a position. Allow yourself to see making decisions as an opportunity to achieve something new, different, exciting, and interesting and not as a threat preventing you from moving forward in life. Have faith in you.
© Mary Alade
“What would life be like if we did not make decisions?” By M.H.I. Alade 23rd August 2015 ©
“Decision making can be fun; we learn from the mistakes.” By M.H.I. Alade 23rd July 2014 ©
“Ones destiny is shaped during moments of decision making” by M.H.I. Alade 9th November 2015 ©
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