Valentine: Celebrating love in a milieu of lovelessness


Is the thematic concern of countless literary classics written by renowned writers not love? The legendary love relationships, which historical figures had, were the afflatus that impelled dramatists, poets, and novelists to produce works that centre on love. For example, William Shakespeare, the greatest dramatist of all times, wrote a play called Romeo and Juliet, a dramatic literary classic, the chief theme of which is love. 


And the mention of the word “love” causes joy to well up in our hearts. Don’t we feel happy when other people tell us that they love us; that we are the apples of their eyes? But love is a shop-soiled word that is put to bad use by womanisers and incorrigible philanderers. They use the word “love” to deceive and lure lovelorn ladies to bed. 

And it is a known fact that one of the meanings of love connotes and denotes the erotic relationship that exists between a man and woman. Two persons who belong to the same sex can have erotic relationship, too. The romantic relationship, which exists between two persons, can be described as a love relationship if there is exchange of affection between them, and if they are indulging in coitus. 

But there is a higher type of love to which Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity, commended us. It is called agape love. Christ demonstrated agape love when he laid down his life, and became a ransom for our sins. He chose to die for us because of the immense love he bore for humanity. He died so that we may live. 

But what is love? The Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English defines love as “a strong feeling of caring about someone, especially a member of your family; a strong feeling of liking and caring about someone, especially combined with sexual affection.”

To me, love is the act of benefaction, which a person performs for his or her spouse or friend or relatives without anticipating and/or demanding reciprocity from the recipient of his or her benefaction. Love is the unconditional help, which a person gives to other people, who are in dire need of help, not minding whether they are his friends, relations, and parents.

And dating back to many years ago, St Valentine has become the symbol of love. So, on every February 14, peoples from diverse racial backgrounds will mark the St. Valentine’s day. It is a day people demonstrate their affection for their hubbies, wives, parents, relations, and friends. It is characterized by exchange of gifts among people. So, there is no doubt that St. Valentine is a symbol of love. 


However, there are myths woven around St. Valentine. Some people feel that the story of St. Valentine is a mythologized tale that has literary conceits about the importance of love. Our reading the St. Valentine story will help us to imbibe the virtue of love. But there are convincing proofs that St. Valentine was a historical person, who actually lived in the time past, and performed acts of love for other people. In fact, he embodied the virtue of love in his person.

But does love still exist in our today’s world, especially in Nigeria? This a rhetorical question given the frequency of the perpetration of evil deeds by evil-minded people on a daily basis in Nigeria. So nobody can gainsay or controvert the fact that we are living in a season and milieu of lovelessness. 

For example, now, in Nigeria, we have hard-hearted and unscrupulous politicians, who do corner our collective financial resources to satisfy their vanities, thereby subjecting the masses to avoidable but excruciating economic hardship. At the three tiers of government, we have political leaders, who are adepts at committing financial larceny and looting of our collective money. Are those thieving politicians, who are unscrupulous people, actuated by feelings of love? The answer to this question is an emphatic no.

Again, daily, in Nigeria, we are regaled with gory and mind- boggling tales of homicidal deeds, which are executed by self-professed Christians and Muslims. In the north, for example, the Boko Haram insurgents, Fulani herdsmen, and terrorists take a great delight in killing other people so as to achieve their theocratic and selfish goals. And cult killings and the menace of the gunmen are ravaging the southeast now. Kidnapping people for ransom has become a thriving business in the area, too. But do murderers and kidnappers possess the virtue of love? 


More so, religious leaders, who should be effecting moral regeneration among us, have morphed to religious mountebanks. They beguile vulnerable women and gullible men into parting with their money. They hide behind the veneer of faked spirituality and chastity to perform such atrocious and abominable deeds. So it is obvious to us that those purveyors of spiritual charlatanism do not possess the virtue of love.

More so, in many homes in Nigeria, husbands and wives squabble over diverse issues, which cause the spike in divorce and separation rate in Nigeria. And domestic violence, which is prevalent among spouses in Nigeria, has caused the deaths of countless Nigerians. A man, who is filled with the virtue of love, cannot abuse his wife, physically, not to talk of him murdering her. And can a woman, who genuinely loves her husband, cuckold him? 

So to say that love is a scarce commodity among us is to state an obvious and incontrovertible fact. We have become egotists, narcissists, and self-centered people, who are pachydermatous to the feelings of other people. Gone are the days when a man was his brother’s keeper. Our insatiable cravings for material possessions and pursuit of money have made us become unfeeling and wicked human beings. 

Our non- possession of the virtue of love is intrinsically linked to the problems militating against the political stability of Nigeria and her economic and technological development. A man who is possessed of the virtue of love will not kill other people for religious and political reasons. A political leader, who embodies love in his person will not steal public money entrusted in his care for the development of his country. 

There is no doubt that we live in a season and milieu of lovelessness. So as we mark the St. Valentine’s day, which is symbolic of love, let us advert our minds to the teachings of our various religions, whose doctrinal foundations are based on the teachings of love. 
• Okoye, a poet, wrote from Uruowulu-Obosi, Anambra State.

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