By Segun Durowaiye

Ireti didn’t know how to frame a lie when the kind Mallam asked about her mum. “Yes, Mallam Bature…she’s okay…but she wants some money from you…” Ireti replied feeling uneasy to frame such a big lie.

“No problem Ireti… I’ll do anything for her so far you’ll be my wife,” he replied. The nice-looking Mallam dipped his hands in his wardrobe and counted N10,000 for the young girl without qualms. Ireti was stunned, surprised and overwhelmed at the sheer generosity of the smooth-talking Mallam.

“Thanks,” Ireti said softly, turned and headed home to give her mum the money. A few months later, the Ireti’s School Certificate Examination was around the corner. Mrs. Mamora approached Mallam Bature on a Saturday afternoon and said:
“Mallam Bature, my very good in-law. I want to let you know that your wife will be sitting for her final School Certificate Examination very soon. She’ll need close to N30,000 as examination fees. I won’t mind if you contribute your own quota so that she can finish her school quickly and pack into your house.”

“My in-law, tell Ireti to come on Monday morning to collect N20,000. Nothing is too big to do for one’s wife. I love your daughter so much, and I’ll do anything to put smile on her face!” he said, with a toothy smile. The following Monday, Mallam Bature gave Ireti the said amount without batting an eyelid. Ireti was so happy that the gentle Mallam could part with such amount for her forthcoming examinations.

She thanked him profusely. Ireti sat for the School Certificate Examination and amazingly when the result were released, she passed all her papers excellently. She had the ambition of studying Medicine and becoming a Medical Doctor.

Mrs. Mamora’s unending wiles always defeat and conquer the wits of the generous Mallam who actually felt that truly she would give him the hand of her beautiful daughter in marriage. The kind-hearted Mallam had fallen hook, line and sinker for the lies, flatteries and ruse of a clever woman. She always called him mugun and would giggle with laughter whenever she left his presence. Mugun in Yoruba parlance means a ‘fool’.

Exactly three months later, Ireti’s grandma died at the ripe age of 92. Mrs. Mamora went to Mallam Bature and told him about the development.

“My mother is dead now Mallam Bature and we have to spend huge money for the burial and every other things. Since I’m your in-law it’s either you buy me a cow or you give me worthwhile amount for the burial ceremony.”

“I’m sorry about that,” Mallam Bature said politely, “May God grant her eternal rest. I’ll give you cash to buy a big cow, though I have cows in the north but that would be stressful bringing it down here. Come tomorrow afternoon and I’ll give you some money for the cow.”

“Thank you very much my in-law,” enthused Mrs. Mamora, “Wo, my daughter will marry you immediately after this burial ceremony.” The following day Mrs. Mamora visited the amiable Mallam and instantly he gave her N200,000 cash as his own contribution. Mrs. Mamora was so happy that Mallam Bature fell for her antics once again. The Mallam even attended the burial ceremony with his friends. After the burial ceremony, exactly two weeks later, Mallam Bature called Mrs. Mamora and told her that he had invested so much in the life of his would-be wife. He said, as a matter of fact, he would be happy to take his wife home so that she could live with him, and even further her studies in his home. He explained that he had been very patient so far because of the love he had for his would-be wife.

“Ha! Haa!! Haaa!!! Ho! Ho!! Ho!!!” Mrs. Momora burst into raucous laughter, “So, since all these years you believe I’ll give you my daughter to marry? You must be sick or something! You’re the biggest fool I’ve ever seen! If you don’t leave my house I’ll shout you’re a thief! Who’ll marry an ‘animal’?!”… To be continued .

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