HEY ladies, I am sure most of us relate to what I am about to share with you…If you are dating a married man, you are in a mess and you need to get out so you can reclaim your life. No more living “on hold.” The sooner you break it off, the better.

A real soul mate would never keep you on the sidelines. A real man would take care of his obligations. Do you really want a man who does this to people? Can you really love a man who is so disrespectful? I know that sometimes, it’s unbelievably hard to break free and that’s what I’m writing about today.

Why is it so hard to break up with a married man, and how can you be free from that bondage? Here’s why it’s so hard to break up with your married boyfriend.

You’re Surrounded by Lies

Any of the lies, evasions, and promises below sound familiar?

*I never would have married her if I had met you first.
*I’m leaving her. Soon.
*I love you so much, please wait for me.
*I can’t leave her because of the kids.
*I’m going to marry you; you’re the woman I’ve waited all my life for.
*She and I don’t sleep together; we haven’t for a long time.
*I don’t love her; I don’t think I ever did. You are my soul mate.
*She said I can see whomever I want. She has someone else too.
*She’s cruel and mean.

I am sure you have heard some if not all these kind of lies and the truth is that you deserve better than a man’s crumbs and love leftovers, and until you accept that and start showing yourself a little (okay, a lot) of heartfelt, soul-deep love, you are going to keep settling for this sad half-life.

You’re Addicted to the Drama, and Your Role in It

No, you’re not confused and uncertain. You know exactly why this is a problem because you are incredibly smart. You’re only pretending to yourself when you say: “I’m just so not sure what to do. I’m so confused.” Why? Because something in you kind of likes being the tragic, sad princess.

You’re Feeling Too Desperate for Some Love and Tenderness

You want love and tenderness, romance and sizzle. Excitement, adoration, pleasure… anything, really.

And “anything” is exactly the problem. The reason you’ve stayed so long is because you’re desperate for any sign of love from a man. Other words for it? Clingy, needy, emotionally hungry. Spiritually starved etc. And that’s what you have got to fix.

You’re Telling Yourself This One Huge Lie: “I’m Not Strong Enough to Leave him.”

You’ve been insanely loving and patient with your married boyfriend. You’ve waited patiently on the sidelines, tried to be understanding, bent over backwards to be accommodating. In fact, those are the very things that show how incredibly strong you are. You were strong enough to love in ridiculously challenging circumstance. So yes you are also strong enough to leave him forever and thrive.

You Haven’t Yet Realized That You Are blocking The Real Love of Your Life!

This isn’t the kind of love you dreamed of.
Sneaking around with a married man, waiting and hoping he will change something in your life is not how you thought a beautiful, lifelong love would be.

You are in charge of your own life, gorgeous woman. You deserve to have all the love the world wants to send you. And by staying in this half-relationship with a married boyfriend, by staying in this tragic princess mode, you’re actually preventing real love from happening.

What you need to do is…

Break It Off With the Married Boyfriend

*Tell him clearly and plainly that it’s over. For good.
*Move into your own place, or get all his stuff out of your apartment. Get your own things back from him, or let it go for good.
*Get rid of anything you own “together” or else agree who will take over that item.
*Do not accept money, gifts, or support from him.
*Stop cooking for him, contacting him, or checking in with him.
*Block his calls and texts, block him on social networks, do a total social cleanse.
*Stop seeing and talking to his friends and/or relatives.
*Find new restaurants, hangouts that are yours; not the places the two of you shared.

Work Towards Your Beautiful Future

What are your top 3 goals for life right now? Get busy and make a plan for meeting those goals and work your plan. Invest in your passions. And don’t be deceived: this is work. But it’s good work, and it’s going to pay off in lots of soul satisfaction.

Expand Your Social Network

Now is the time to start renewing and expanding your circle of friends, mentors etc (especially if you’ve been centering your life around a married boyfriend).

Start Casually Dating Other Guys

When I say “casual” I don’t mean sleeping around. Go out, but leap in with both feet and all your heart. Maintain your reserve. Let things unfold gently over time. See what happens. And when I say “guys” I mean more than one. Lightly shop around, see what’s going on in the universe of men. Your world has been too small and cramped for too long, you know?

Get Help When You Need It

If you’re stuck, spend some time getting help from an emotionally healthy friend or adviser. Learn from your mistakes, and move on with fresh confidence and remember, making mistakes doesn’t make you a screw-up. Making mistakes is proof that you’re actively trying. Instead of smacking yourself on the forehead and saying, “What was I thinking?” take a moment to breathe deeply and ask

“What was I learning?” instead. You’re going be great. You can do this, beautiful woman.
To our happiness. Cheers.