Finding happiness: The secret of true living – Part 2
(e) Daily take charge of the small as well as big things: Living consists of the small and big things each day and not just the big events expected in the future. Therefore, it is important to take responsibility for the little things today. Don’t postpone, procrastinate or look down on their importance but take responsibility for living and know that living can be hard and tasking on you.
“Happy people plan actions, they don’t plan results.”
To experience happiness one must take personal responsibility for living and for their happiness.
Here is how you can practically achieve the last 7 steps you need for your living and for your happiness.
(f) Be thy best self: Peak performance begins with you taking complete responsibility for your life and everything that happens to you”.
Here are five questions to ask yourself on how you can practically be your best self.
(1) Do I blame others or things for where I am today?
(2) Do I connect each result in my life with a belief, thoughts, attitude, emotion I have?
(3) Do I Remind myself that my outside experiences is a direct reflection of my internal map?
(4) Do I complain about or blaming others for things that happen to me and/or where I am?
(5) Do I take positive actions about and towards everything I’m not happy about in my life?
“Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self-worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can’t love and respect yourself – no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are – completely; the good and the bad – and make changes as YOU see fit – not because you think someone else wants you to be different.”
(g) Develop a healthy self esteem; have self confidence and believe in yourself: A lack of healthy self esteem is an indication that you’re not living and it is a big reason why you are not happy. A lack of healthy self esteem, self confidence and self belief is also a reason why many cant take responsibility for living. Many alternatively blame someone else for their life experiences and create a victim mentality rather than taking full responsibilities for living. This then proceeds to damage many vital parts of your life such as your relationships, finances and, achievements. Also for successful living you must stop relying on external validation like praise from other people to feel good about yourself. You need to always remember that your level of success is fully dependent upon your level of self-esteem, confidence and belief.
Eight keys to developing self-esteem; self-confidence and belief:
1) Take responsibility for and focus on yourself and stop comparing yourself with others
2) Accept, honour, respect and love yourself just the way you are
3) Live in the here and NOW – Do the things you Enjoy and Love; Love and Enjoy the things you do
4) Stand up for yourself – Stop Blaming Yourself; Be Kind and caring to Yourself…Stop being too hard on yourself…
5) Be true to yourself – Find your TRUTH and be at PEACE with it
6) Live Purposefully – You are Legitimately here – “LIVE IT”
7) Celebrate your achievements –However little – Focus on your strengths and the good rather than on the bad or on your weaknesses
8) Have Positive Faith – Believe in yourselfand believe in God
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi
(h) Be Selfless-Give: “The Universe is not interested in what you need, but in what you have to give”. There is a famous saying that “you always receive exactly what you give in life”. This means that you should not give what you wont like to receive. It is also more blessed to give than to receive. The livelihood of a man does not consist in what he has but in who he Is and how much of himself he gives to humanity.
“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” Robert A. Heinlein
(I) Know your purpose and live purposely: know you’re here. Knowing why you’re here is the meaning of living; it is vital for being able to grow mentally, spiritually, emotionally, finding true fulfilment and happiness. For people who have not discovered their purpose life can feel vague and empty. When you know your life purpose, you understand that the things that happen to you are not random, but part of a whole; hence all things work together for your good. Your life’s task (your purpose) is something you brought in to the world with you. To find fulfilment and satisfaction in life, you need to connect with it and daily live it.
How to develop one’s your purpose: Questions to ask oneself:
1) What does life want from me?
2) What can I give to Life?
3) What solution am i?
4) What can I give of myself effortlessly and for free?
5) How can I get that thing I want?
6) Am I self motivated or am I driven by others? What motivates me?
7) What am I able to do for FREE?
8) What is it that when I do time passes and I don’t care?
9) What is it that if I’m given $100m, I won’t stop doing?
10) What is it that I’m passionate about?
11) What is it that aligns with my natural gifts and talents?
12) What is it that I do effortlessly?
13) What is it that when I’m woken up from sleep I can do very well without preparation?
(j) Decide to be happy: “If you refuse to choose, you lose”. I want to be happy and I decide to be happy connote different things and carry different weights. Love is not just something you feel, it is something you do. To truly love is a decision of the most active and accountable kind.
“We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”
How to make the right decisions to be happy: Questions to ask oneself:
1) What do I really want
2) Why do I want it- The reason why you want what you want is often times more important than what you want.
3) What are my choices or options?
4) What are my excuses for not deciding to be happy yet?
5) Which consequences of my decisions am I afraid of?
6) Why am I afraid of these consequences?
7) Do I usually make decisions myself? Or Do I wait for people to help/ Influence me or for something to happen inadvertently?
8) Do I make decisions at the right time?
9) Do I know which decisions are truly important to me?
10) Am I able to trust my intuition when making decisions?
11) Are my decisions based on faith in myself and/or my possibilities?
(k) Daily living and happiness confession/ affirmation: The power of life and death is in the tongue your belly is filled with the fruits of your lips. Your words create and frame your world.
I Let Go
I recognize my positive patterns, and I decide to consciously love to live
I live to love.
I release myself into positivity.
I therefore see, think, hear, feel, and say only that which I desire.
I have only Powerful and Positive thoughts.
I confess only positive and empowering words.
I have powerful and positive feelings and I take deliberate action in this regard.
I live In the NOW
I love life as it is now.
What I do now creates my future.
I Therefore create the future of my dreams now.
My attention is focused on great things that I can do today”
I am my Best Self always
I show up and turn up everyday
I am responsible for my happiness and well-being.
I recognize the direct connection between my positive and empowering thoughts, inner feelings, beliefs, and my phenomenal achievements.
I therefore positively contribute to creating all circumstances, situations, and the events in my life”
I treat myself with understanding and respect in every situation, and in every encounter with others. I choose to love and value myself. I choose to allow myself to be treated with respect and appreciation.
I embrace my life as it is now. I love myself exactly as I am now”.
I Live Purposefully
I give my life sense and meaning because I know my true purpose.
I choose the goal that best enables me to express my personal, and spiritual power.
I am Happy today and Everyday
“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”
Thich Nhat Hannah
If you feel like you deserve to experience life and live life happily and would like us to coach you through this journey send us an email @firstname.lastname@example.org or call 08077077000
The Catalyst, Lanre Olusola
Africa’s Premier Life, Mind, Emotions & Behavioural Change Coach