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Sex and religion: are all copulation styles allowed for married couples?


Lanre Olusola

When our fellow humans give us gifts, we are not being told or instructed on how or when to use such gifts. Once you are in possession of the gift (s), you have the liberty to use it when and how it suits you. This also relates with sex.

Sex is one of the greatest gifts by God to married people; and we all know that everything God created is perfect and good. God is the originator of sex and He permits the act to be done within the confines of marriage.

A certain pastor released a video, narrating that in a vision, God took him to hell fire. God led him to a very special part of hell that was allocated to Christians precisely legitimate married couples that partook in different sex styles while they were alive. He further narrated that there was a very different kind of torture these Christians were subjected to because of the various sex styles they were involved in, such as doggy style, oral sex, etc.


This pastor described that in that part of hell fire, there is an abattoir with a table where those who have done all sorts of sex styles apart from the missionary style, are butchered. He went on to describe that the butchering was done slowly, when their body parts have been butchered, they then come back together and the butchering starts all over again. It was a continuous torture.

First of all, I am still yet to find out the place where God stated that the kind of sin you commit will depend on the place in hell fire you will be sent to, as well as the kind of torture you will receive. Secondly, where was it stated that the Missionary style is the style God approved only in sex, or the Missionary style is the holy or religious way to have sex with your spouse? Thirdly, no sane person, talk less of a true child of God will deceive innocent people this way.

Now, from the above story there is every trace of fallacy from the pastor, whose intent is just to ruin and mislead people, as well as destroying marriages by preventing couples from enjoying a free gift God has given them in whichever way they desire it. God has given us the liberty to have sex in marriage, so why would an individual especially one who claims to be a servant of God, impose his own personal perception of sex on his followers, when it is clearly obvious that there is no scriptural reference to back up his claim? Do not allow a personal perception of an individual become a doctrine to you.

Individuals who claim that a certain sex position is the only appropriate position ordained by God end up achieving the following:
• Corrupt the minds of people
• Mislead people
• Put them in bondage
• Wreck people’s marriages

One of the irrational myths associated with sex position is that if a wife is on top of her husband during sex, it means that the man is relinquishing his power and headship. Based on the Bible and Quran, which are God’s Words to humans, there was no verse where it was stated that there are limitations on how couples should derive sexual pleasure from their spouse. The Bible or Quran does not restrict sex positions or styles couples should adopt during sex.

Individuals should not have a say on how couples should have sex since God did not specify the kind of style or position one should take during sex. God created sex with no parameters especially within the confines of marriage. Allow people have happy marriages, allow people to have liberty in their marriages, allow people to hit ecstasy in sex in their marriages.

Since sex is allowed and approved by God to be done only in marriage, it is a reward when you do it; Sex is designed to discourage sex outside marriage. It is a good deed and it is something that couples are obliged to give to each other. As long as you are married, you are obliged to please and satisfy your partner. Therefore, if both parties are comfortable with whatever style that pleases them, then there is nothing wrong with it.


Ignorance binds people. A lot of marriages have been shattered as a result of lack of sexual fulfillment between the couple. Sex is a very strong connection between husband and wife, therefore, if couples aren’t connecting, then, there is a huge breaker in the marriage. If you are married and not having good sex, you need to fix it. Own up. Try different sex styles. Be adventurous. It is legal and not wrong to have any sex style with your spouse, so far it pleases you both.

People should stop perpetuating about things that are not scriptural. To the religious leaders and bodies, it is very important that you don’t position your personal opinion as God’s instruction. Focus on getting people to be good and God fearing, to live and do right in their daily lives. Leave matters that have no biblical backings or references. Because you are a religious leader to a couple, that does not give you an authority over their sexual/marriage lives.

Please and satisfy your spouse in whichever way they want to have or enjoy sex. By doing this, the possibility of a failed marriage is unlikely to occur.
The Catalyst, Lanre Olusola

Africa’s Premier Life, Mind, Emotions & Behavioural Change Coach
*** This article is a summary from The Uncensored Talk, a radio show hosted by Lanre Olusola on Lagos Talks 91.3 Thursdays at 9.30pm. Is your life is spiralling out of control, are being abused? Do you want to stop being an abuser? Contact us today and let us help you – 08077077000 or email Follow The Catalyst on social media – @lanreolusola

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