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Rundown Of The Week

Gorillas. Photo Edward Wright

It’s only the beginning of the year, and some of the strangest things have started happening. From animals getting a feel of the human experience to humans getting caught in feeling and dealings. Here is a rundown of the week:

COVID strikes
Remember the slang, “COVID is outside?” It turns out that COVID is really outside and is affecting other creatures in the hominid family. Eight gorillas at the San Diego Zoo Safari Park are presumed to have contracted Covid-19 from a human handler. One of the animals tested positive, making it the first known transmission of the virus to apes, zoo officials said. Three among the band of critically endangered western lowland gorillas showed symptoms of the respiratory virus, such as coughing. Just as everyone else, the Zoo officials do not know how the coronavirus will ultimately affect gorillas or what additional symptoms may occur, but we remain hopeful.


Lori “Daphne Bridgerton”
All hail Lori Daphne Bridgerton, the most eligible bachelorette on the planet. In another “love” move, she has swoon the sexiest man alive Michael B. Jordan with her beauty, grace and chemical X. The loverboy and 33-year-old shared photos of himself and Harvey as he gazed lovingly into her eyes. The 24-year-old has in times past been romantically linked to other famous celebs like Diddy, Future and Trey Songz. This is besides her engagement to Memphis Depay. Interestingly, Meek Mill has been a trolls’ target since the reveal because of his desire to also have her. To broken hearts, want another glass?

No dump
If you are one to visit the bathroom every time nature calls, then you might be in for trouble if you work with Chinese organization, Anpu Electric Science and Technology. The company took a massive hit from the public after news emerged that it was fining “lazy” employees who take more than one toilet break per day.
The company admitted to fining employees $3 out of their monthly bonuses for using the toilet more than once a day. In notices issued by the company and leaked online, at least seven staff members were penalised on December 20 and 21. If you were wondering, they find it difficult to get new employees, so a deduction seems appropriate.

“World’s unluckiest burglars”
Two ill-fated burglars might be itched in our memories as the “world’s unluckiest burglars” after one of them accidentally pocket-dial the police during their crime. This term was coined by Chief Inspector John Owen, as he likened them to the ill-fated crooks in the film “Home Alone.” To achieve a full effect, he also included a gif of the “Home Alone” character Marv, a tall and dim-witted thief who was unsuited for a life of crime. He explained that the dial allowed officers to hear the crime in progress and ultimately listen in on their colleagues arresting the duo. Ill luck next time (if there is one).

Good riddance
A Turkish court sentenced a Muslim televangelist who surrounded himself with scantily clad women he called “kittens” to more than 1,000 years in jail for sex crimes. Adnan Oktar preached creationism and conservative values while women in revealing outfits, many of whom appeared to have had plastic surgery, danced around him to upbeat music in the TV studio.

The bearded 64-year-old, detained with over 200 other suspects, was sentenced to 1,075 years for crimes including sexual assault, sexual abuse of minors, fraud and attempted political and military espionage. Recall that last year, we reported that a cult leader who claims to be Jesus was arrested by Russian security forces.

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