A crust of individualism

I was listening to a podcast sometime ago and the host was talking about when he randomly asked a taxi driver what the most difficult part of his job was. The taxi driver replied; ‘Many people out here, driving on the road are so entitled. Everyone has got somewhere to go and if you’re in their way, you’re holding them back from where they need to go, and you’re simply an obstacle because; they deserve and are entitled to get where they need to go, and they don’t even take into consideration that you are on the road, that we all have somewhere we need to go, that we all have somewhere we need to be at a certain time. They just believe they have a right for you to get out of their way’.

In an expressive individualistic society like ours, looking beyond ourselves implies that there is a greater cause than us, and in this case, a greater being. It implies that someone stands above us and can exert some form of authority or claim on our lives or what it’s supposed to be about and we are not having that. Therefore, we resist any such reality or claims of moral authority and we charge against concepts or institutions that we perceive demands anything from us.

The reason isn’t far-fetched – ‘the real me must not be stifled’ and I have the right to express myself however I like therefore, anything that seeks to conform me to standards or ideals that are out of myself is the enemy.  The argument always goes something like this – ‘I have my freedom; therefore, I can do whatever I like. I have to live my truth’ and me not living my truth is a betrayal of my identity.’ Essentially, their vocation or call is to live their truth. The writers of the book ‘Habits of the heart’ is a case in point and they put it this way:

“We believe in the dignity, indeed the sacredness, of the individual. Anything that would violate our right to think for ourselves, judge for ourselves, make our own decisions, live our lives as we see fit, is not only morally wrong, it is sacrilegious”.

With such a widespread individualistic mentality present in our society, it is easy to assume that people are now a lot less religious. Well not really. Religiosity doesn’t exactly disappear; rather, we panel beat religiosity into whatever shape we want it to take with little or no regard for what it’s supposed to be. We essentially practice a Christianity or Islam of convenience. We pick the aspects we like and roll with it (as long as it doesn’t stress us out) and those other aspects we do not like, we act like they are non-existent. It does not matter what is true or not. Faith now becomes a choice that suits our physiological and psychological state. Faith becomes a tool to aid in our pursuit of self-exaltation and self-fulfillment, something that exists to satisfy our whims and caprices.

We claim authenticity and originality in our methods and whether or not we identify as Christians is very contextual. So what happens is this – We forge our own religion, we forge or mold our Christianity or Islamic beliefs into what we want it to be, into what is convenient for us to be with complete disregard for what it ought to be.  We now have our own personal Jesus, our own personal Gospel, our own personal Koran that is different from every other person’s own because, faith and religion depends on individual understanding and injunction. After all, we have freedom and you should let nothing constrain you. We hear things like -” follow your own path of spiritual inspiration. Do not be steered off yours by the allegation that it doesn’t fit with some orthodoxy. Do not conform! “and it goes on and on… Because of course, religion is personal, right?

In essence, our religiosity or spirituality is all glazed with individualism – It has a crust of individualism. Therefore, anything that is an obstacle to our self-appraisal, self-exaltation or basal self-satisfaction is a problem. We dissociate ourselves from any binding ethic, morals that are absolute and objective truths that are transcendent. Those who have a stance on right and wrong are viewed as extremists because everything is relative. Everything else must bow to the paragon that is me and my truth and me and me and me. Of course, God is there and very present even but I am the one in control of my stuff and no one should try to tell me otherwise.

Interestingly, expressive individualism does not always empty the church of its members. It sometimes just fills the pews with people who see their church attendance simply as another expression of their own identities and an aid in their own pursuit of self-satisfaction and happiness.

We see the church as an enterprise that has limited, if any real authority. We have that ‘I am the boss of me’ attitude even when the mighty me is in the church pew. Since we ourselves are too busy doing hide and seek with objective truths, we obviously cannot pass such truths to others. This is largely because we haven’t come to fully accept those truths, mostly out of love of comfort and sheer arrogance, less commonly out of ignorance and generally, we just don’t care. When anyone tries to tell us otherwise, we quickly play the freedom card and remind them that we are free. We forget quickly too that freedom is not license, that freedom is rooted in responsibility.
 
Unity is not just nice, it’s part of our existence as people of faith; Christians, Moslems, Traditional religious practitioners. Truth is, If you want to truly live, you have to live for others. This is what brings true happiness and gives us a deeper sense of meaning as opposed to individualism which robs us of a sense of meaning.  We are made to live for God. St. Augustine put it so well when he said ‘our hearts are made for God and they are restless until they find rest in you’. We are made to live for others.  But we have allowed individualism to form a very hard crust on our hearts. We have closed our hearts to realities beyond ourselves and even when we perceive these realities to be palpable, we deny it.
 
We need to open our hearts a lot more and peel off the crust of individualism that has latched on so strongly to our hearts. If we don’t take our heads out of the oven of our very clouded and checkered judgment, erroneous ideals and exaggerated sense of autonomy, capacity and freedom, we are going to end up burnt and completely consumed by our own selfishness. Individualism will not only ruin the crust but also the core of our hearts till it becomes dry and arid – and my friend, in arid regions, nothing survives there or at least, most good things don’t.
 Ms Olamide Oba is a student of University of Ibadan.