Celebrity ‘Mums’ And The Joy Of Motherhood
IT is Mother’s Day and it is that time again when attention will be focused on motherhood, maternal bonds and the influence of mothers in society. Some Nollywood celebrities who are themselves mothers say they will not be left out in the ‘honours party’ for mothers and motherhood. SHAIBU HUSSEINI caught up with a few of them and they spoke about being ‘celebrity mums’ and the challenges and joys of motherhood.
THE first time I became a mother was such a painfully joyous occasion that I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world. I was, and I also was not prepared for the responsibilities of motherhood. Needless to say, I was trained on the job, and the natural instinct to nurture another life kicked in. My whole world changed because I had to focus on my newborn son, and that experience sort of prepared me for my other two children. I see motherhood as a continuous school of learning and training for every stage of their development and the need to bring up a good boy, a responsible man, a gentleman and a God-fearing man from the babies I gave birth to is a process that I still see as a gift from God, because in those experiences I also see how patiently God has been with us through our strengths and weaknesses. Motherhood is a gift and a responsibility that I don’t take lightly. That is why my being a celebrity doesn’t automatically translate to being the perfect mother for my children alone, but I must cast aside my work or status to nurture them rightly, because they don’t see me as the celebrity mum, but simply as mum. I go through the same trials as other mothers. I don’t get a get-out-of-mum-free card just because I am a celebrity. Although my children complain when I travel for too long, I try to make up for it when I am around, bearing in mind that I should not indulge them too much in the process as well. Thank God they are good boys and their dad helps out a lot. For that I am grateful to God.
IT has been a rollercoaster for me. It is fulfilling being a mum. When my kids were younger it was challenging keeping them out of the media. So, they lived normal lives. But now they are all grown up and mature to know the difference of what is true and what is false. My work as an actress and President of the Actors’ Guild of Nigeria (AGN) has taken most of my time now to the extent that my members forget that I have my own children and family to take care off. But I share my time with my kids and these days I make sure at holidays I spend everyday with my kids. It has been joy and complete fulfillment for me. God is awesome. I could not have made it without God and the support of my family. They are my best friends and confidants and critics as well.
I HAVE been a mum for as long as I can remember and by that I mean that I have younger ones whom I took care of when the job was becoming too burdensome for my mum (RIP EGOYIBO). I enjoyed helping out in any little way that I could but it is a much more different ball game when the ones you are playing mum with are actually yours. I have been a real mum for almost eight years now and it has been beautiful. The experience is as real as life gets. From watching the children grow and being there for them (and their daddy too) to taking my time to make certain decisions in my career that would favor all of us, and then to having the realisation hit you that whatever choices you make in life isn’t just for you but for the ones that God has put in your care. I love being a mum. It is the best job ever and nothing thrills me more to hear my children call me “mummy” and when they call over the phone to ask how I am doing and also say those words ‘we miss you mummy’…. its just a blessing. I pray for more grace for me and other mums out there. Just as our mothers laid down their dreams just to help us the children pursue ours, in that stride we hope to work to make sure we bring the best out of our own children. If a child fails, the mother has failed.
WHAT can I say is the difference between Celebrity Mums and other Mums? The difference may be the fact that as searchlight is beamed on the celebrities so it is on their parents. For me, my mother is very calm. She sees her obligation to me as that of prayer and encouragement. She stands by my side all the time knowing that if any bad story circulates about me it will also affecs her and the family. Thus, celebrity mothers, I think, try to adjust in their public life to match the public perception of their children who are celebrities. As for whether I enjoy motherhood, of course I do. Nothing is as pleasing as a mother sitting by her children, teaching and learning from them. Motherhood is a joyful and prestigious position by order of creation. God made it so. We mothers are happy and we enjoy it. To be a mum is to be happy and joyful. So here is wishing all the mothers including myself a Happy Mother’s Day.
MOTHERHOOD has brought me immeasurable joy. I see motherhood as a natural transition and I am quite proud and will remain ever proud of that phase of my life. It has changed me a whole lot. It has slowed me down a lot and has made me a softer person. As a mother; now I think that whatever I fail to do for my family, I might not have another opportunity to do it again. So, I am focusing more on them even as I create time to work as a creative person.
AS a working actress and a film producer, the role of being a mum becomes increasingly challenging because I am constantly required to pack a bag and get on the road. No one said life itself gets any easier, but my ability to balance out my role as a mum and live an active professional life is where the true test lies. The birth of my now six-year-old daughter is a miracle of love that transformed me as a person because I had her at a very young age and despite all of the fears I had as a young mum, I wanted to be a great mum and a better person. The main challenge for me was to accept the fact that I was about to lose the impulsiveness of life and be entirely responsible for someone else’s life which in turn taught me to pay more attention to things, be more patient and appreciative of the tiniest things in life. Motherhood is a great learning experience because believe it or not: Kids were born to teach us the things we don’t know and we owe it to them as mothers to help them navigate their way through life. I wish us happy Mother’s Day.