Love story: Re- she seems not to like my daughter
This much, I will share with you. Never think about change when it comes on to a relationship.
What you see is what you get; people do not change like that.
If you find a quality in a person that you do not like, living together is not going to change it, marriage is not going to change it, that quality is not going away with time.
So, if she cannot handle your daughter being around, then you have to say to her that you understand, but your daughter is a permanent part of your life, your flesh and blood and anyone that you bring into your daughters life should be able to accept her.
Your daughter has a mother and you are not looking for another mother for her, but any woman that you associate with should be able to accept her.
I have seen too many step relationships fail, and this is a clear sign that it is going in the wrong direction… Some persons cannot handle it.
Many years ago, I dated a woman with kids. They were absolutely beautiful girls and I loved them dearly.
Their father hated the fact that I was in their mother’s life and started acting up with his ex and would sometimes say derogatory things about me to the girls.
They would share with me the things he said, but I knew that if there was a time I did or said anything that they never agreed with, they would be quick to remind me that I am not their dad and would resent me if we were going in different directions.
The hardest decision I had to make was not staying because of what was happening, but what inevitably would happen when those girls got older? I decided to walk away from a woman that I utterly loved.
We would disagree with punishment to the girls if they did anything wrong and it went on and on and she was very impatient with my methods, because they were her girls, I was not there when she was giving birth.
I had sleepless nights with my thoughts and eventually walked away.
Do not beat up on her, do not see her as unreasonable, but sometimes, you just have to go your separate ways, because in a relationship of this nature, your daughter is your first priority.
YOUR child must come first before that woman or anything else, including your own desire to be with this woman.
She is not cut out to be in a relationship with you, because she evidently cannot handle the fact that you have a child.
You can have an ex wife or ex girlfriend, but there is no such things as ex parent or ex child.
Girlfriends will come and go, but your child will always be your child. You should not be happy at the expense of your child.
No matter how much you love her, this woman is not for you to keep, not because she is a bad woman, but simply because you two are not on the same page.
She sees your daughter as her rival and soon, she will make you choose between your daughter and her.
She will change for the worse after you two have your own child, because she will have more hold on you.
You will find yourself in a more miserable situation when she has her own child.
Because you love this woman so much, you would always want to appease her in order not to lose her (you already started now actually) but some things are not open for compromise, especially when it comes to your own flesh and blood.
Don’t get confuse too long. Your own daughter is at stake and she will likely be the one who will pay the full price if you make a wrong decision.
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