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Creating family memories


Charles Ighele

About twenty sticks of suya with nice chunks of meat were on the central table in our living room last Sunday evening. There were also different types of snacks and “soft” drinks. My household had had an early dinner. Apart from members of my household that beautiful Sunday evening, three pastors (two of whom are couples) from our ministry were also present. Two of one of our pastor’s teenage children were also there.

The suya and drinks were shared and placed by the individual’s side, while other snacks were kept on the central table, where anyone could go and take to keep keeping the mouth busy.

At about 8pm, all the lights in the living room were switched off. It is our weekly family movie night and for about one hour and thirty minutes, people were engrossed in a high quality American movie with high moral contents. Once or twice, shouts and laughter by the other people in the living room woke me up. I had dozed off. Anyway, I enjoyed the part that I watched and the fellowship with my family and the invited and uninvited guests that spent their precious evenings with us.We have the family movie night once or twice a week. At the beginning of the week, we decide, which day or days should be set aside for it.


Right from when I wedded Carol in 1986, I decided that two of us would create time for fun. Two days before that beautiful Sunday, I had taken her out to have lunch, as part of our weekly eating out schedule. In those early days, we would go to a cheap but neat restaurant to have nice meals or go to a five star hotel, just to share a bottle of malt drink by the swimming pool side.

We know what it is like to be very busy all of the day. With running the ministry with people demanding all the hours of our days for counseling, prayers, church services, travel-ministration, television recordings, writing articles for newspapers and magazines, granting interviews to journalists, and many more obligations, we decided early in our ministry that no matter what, we would always create a special time for each other and the whole family. This we did deliberately because we felt it would be unwise to give others outside our best and give each other and our children nothing but a tired spouse and a yawning and tired mummy and daddy.

A study has shown that many 21st century marriages may end up in a worse condition than previous ones, because the time spouses spend together is sadly getting shorter daily and the discussions, getting more functional. With the husband and wife rushing out to their workplaces and coming back tired each day, there is hardly time and energy to lovingly communicate and build up friendship with themselves, their children and entire household.

Presently, our children are grown and most times, we find ourselves talking and enjoying the beautiful times we all shared in the past as a family. Because of the memories we created together and the ones we still create daily, we have been able to build a strong bond of friendship. It is good for parents to know that children remember more of past fun times and sweet memories than the school fees you paid for them and the food you laboured to put on the table.

No matter how busy you are, always reserve your best for your spouse, children and household. Create memories. It has a way of bonding couples, their children and the entire household. Create fun. Have fun. Love you.


In this article:
Charles Ighele
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