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Daddy, where are you?


DAD IS DESTINY is the first chapter of a book that I have just written. The book is titled BUT WHERE IS MY DADDY? DAD IS DESTINY is the title of an article written in the February 27, 1995 edition of one of the world’s most famous newspapers known as THE US NEWS AND WORLD REPORT. The paper wrote, “More than virtually any other factor, a biological father’s presence in a family will determine a child’s success and happiness.”
It’s a book every male and every mother should have.

When my dad saw that I was struggling academically in his house in primary school, he took me to go and stay with his younger sister, whose husband was a headmaster in a village primary school and I became one of the best three students in our class.

But in secondary school, I started moving with some bad boys. We would go to the bush to fish with hooks. We would roast the fish and eat. We thought we were enjoying.

One boy by name Celestine went secretly to report me to my parents. The holiday that followed after the secret was revealed to my parents was a very horrible one for me. My father would come to my room and tell me: “I sent you to school to learn and be educated. Instead, you are going to the river and ponds to catch fish. Okay, no problem. I will buy hooks and fishing net for you, so that you can become a proper fisherman.” He could say such things to me up to three in a day.


But I did not really see anything wrong in what I was doing. I thought I was having fun. He withdrew a lot of my privileges. The Mission school I attended was in the rural area, and at that time, my father had no car. But he would charter an expensive-looking taxi for me with a lot of provisions.

So, I used to arrive school like a big shot. He also used to give me a lot of pocket money. But my father, Mr. Israel Ighele, withdrew all these.
He started giving me one pound per term as pocket money and of course, no more milk, Ovaltine, etc. The most painful thing was that he made me go to school in a lorry.

At a stage, he had to withdraw me from that school to another school and from the midst of those friends whom he felt were too strong for me. It was from this new school that my academic light started to gradually shine again.

About twenty something years ago, we lost a very elderly person who was dear to us in life and ministry. We went for a burial in a remote village. On getting to the village for the wake keep that evening; we had a little problem with the generator we took there. An electrician from the village came to our aid.

He happened to be one of those boys I used to move with in school going for fishing and practising how to dance James Brown’s “Hey! Hey! I feel alright, three times. Ahn, ahn, ahn.” He is an electrician in a small village, where there is no public power supply.

Where would I have been if my daddy were not there to father me?
A child that was arrested for a crime sometime ago, lamented that if his daddy were there for him, he wouldn’t have found himself in chains. This nation is becoming too lawless. Fathers should wake up to provide leadership because DAD IS DESTINY. Love you.


In this article:
Charles Ighele
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