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Evidence of wrong relationship 2019 – Part 18


Solomon Ojigiri

Relationship where there is no regard for the people you love or highly esteem: When you are in a relationship with a man or a lady, and he/she does not respect the people you really respect or cannot love the people you actually love, it is an indication that you are in a wrong relationship. Just like we talked about hot love and obsession as one of the signs of a wrong relationship because it makes you to love the man or the lady alone and you do not want to bother about your relationship with others. So also, a man or a lady that claims to love you but has no iota of love for the people you really love is just deceiving you. One of the characteristics of true love or one of the ways to know if someone actually loves you is that the person will love anyone you love.

For instance, there are people that you know, love and respect, even before you met your fiancé or fiancée; e.g. your pastor, your parents, relatives, your siblings, brothers and sisters and even your friends. If you notice that the man or the lady does not like to see them or relate with them or you discover that he or she hates them or despises them, that can be a sign of a wrong relationship because it is not possible to get married and not have friends, parents, and other relationship. I often advise married people that there is no better way to express their love for their spouses than to show genuine love to the people their spouses love or hold in high esteem. Any form of disrespect or hatred for such a person that your fiancé or fiancée loves can also cost you your relationship. Either your fiancé or fiancée will interpret it as hatred or disrespect for him or herself or interpret it that you actually want to monopolise relationship with him or her. It is something we must learn to watch out for in our relationship. The moment you have made up your mind to be in courtship with someone, you must also learn to love the people in his or her life. That does not, however, mean we should not identify bad friends or bad people around him or her. But the truth remains that you must actually be a very terrible person, when you can easily jump into conclusion that everyone in his or her life is bad.


Relationship where there is hatred for the counsels or dishonour for the man of God: when you can no longer respect the counsel of your man of God or spiritual parents simply because of your new found love, it is an indication that you are in a wrong relationship. There are people who are very obedient and respectful to their men of God before they enter into courtship, but when they met their fiancé or fiancée, probably because of pride or the wrong comments of their so-called lover, they now despise and disdain the counsels, advice or words of their man of God. When you can no longer honour a man of God just because of your relationship with your fiancé or fiancée, it is an indication of a wrong relationship. A man or a lady you claim to love, who does not like or love your man of God, is a very dangerous person to consider for marriage. You must learn to carry the person along, so that he can be in love with your man of God. You must do everything you can to make him or her accept and respect your church and your man of God. But if he or she refuses to change, you have to believe God for another person. You cannot get married to such a person. By this, we are not trying to give undue regard to the office of a pastor, but we really need to emphasise the position that God has placed your man of God in your life. Anyone who disrespects a genuine man of God cannot be good candidate for marriage. Your pastor is an authority figure in your life. God wants us to respect them, give them due regard and follow their counsels to avoid errors or anything that will bring regrets in future. That does not mean that the man of God should play God in our lives or control us unnecessarily. Any man of God who is worth his or her salt will not seek to control you, but to guide you and instruct you according to the word of God. Beware of any fiancé or fiancée that encourages you to despise a genuine man of God that you once respected and obeyed.

Contact: Everwinning Faith Ministries Int’l
31, Oritse street, off Awolowo Way, Balogun Bus Stop, Ikeja, Lagos.
Or Everwinning Faith Ministries Int’l
Everwinning Faith Avenue, White sand, Isheri-Osun, (after Ijegun), Lagos.


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