Evidence of wrong relationship – Part 9
It is very important that we understand the fact that prophets have no final say over our lives. The word of God has the final say. In 1Cor. 14:29, the Bible says we are to judge prophecies. We are to judge prophecies because we have the spirit of God in us. There are several ways to judge prophecies. First, we must look at the life of the man prophesying; “by their fruits ye shall know them.” I have seen so-called prophet live in adultery, strife, jealousy, animosity, drunkenness, and all manner of vices, and they still claim that God talk to them. But no matter the genuineness of the life of that prophet, God will still not want you to depend on him or her to choose a life partner for you.
Furthermore, we can judge prophecies by comparing what the prophet said with what the word of God says. The prophecies are of no value, if it is not in agreement with the word of God. That is why I know God cannot say He will lead you by His spirit and at the same time gives another man the right to ruin your life with his false prophecies.
• Relationship Entered Into As A Result Of Dreams: Another indication of a wrong relationship is when the only reason for initiating the relationship was because you had a dream about the person. Sometimes, people tell you if you have so and so dream it means so and so, that as good as it may appear has also misled so many. It is possible for the same dream to have a different meaning. However, I do not bother people about dreams. I simply tell them if it is negative, you can reject it through prayers and if it is positive, you can claim it in prayers.
The Bible made us to know that in the last days, the young people will have vision, but the old ones will dream dreams. I humorously advise young people to leave dreams for old folks to whom God has given them. In Eccl. 5:3 the Bible says, “For a dream cometh through the multitude of business….”
That is to say that dreams can also come as a result of perpetual thought over any matter. There are dreams propelled by activities. God does not want you to rely on dreams in making a choice of who to marry, because more often, dreams are outcome of things that preoccupy our mind. For instance, if you are preparing for examinations, you are likely to dream of examinations. So also, if you think so much of a lady or a man, you might end up seeing such a person in your dreams lifting umbrella for both of you inside the rain. Do not rely solely on dreams, but seek for further confirmation.
• Relationship Entered Into When The Decision To Do So Is Not Yours: It is a wrong relationship when you decide to enter into a relationship, but the decision is not really yours, that is to say that someone else decided for you.
For example, where you were talked, cajoled or coerced into the relationship by the third party, then the decision is not truly yours. Sometimes, you are not convinced about a relationship with someone, but you were lured or forced into it. Sometimes, you may discover you made the decision just to please some people or satisfy your selfish desires or the desire of some others. When you allow yourself to be talked into such relationship, it is nothing but a wrong one. Do not enter into a relationship under duress, coercion or intimidation. You must be fully convinced and persuaded, you must make the decision by yourself.
• Relationship Entered Into Without Proper Searches Or Findings: It is not ideal to rush into any relationship. You must give it quality time. Do not rush into any relationship, rushing into relationship without making proper findings or investigation will end up in wrong relationship. Those who rush in will usually rush out. It is very important for you to know that relationship requires time. You need time to build a lasting relationship from friendship to courtship and from courtship to marriage.
Impatience is a sign of unbelief. It is also a sign of immaturity. It is never in the character of children to wait for anything. A child tells you he or she needs something, if you say tomorrow, he or she will tell you “I need it now.” It is, therefore, immaturity to be in haste. It takes time to know a person and who a person really is. You cannot truly and thoroughly study people without adequate time.
Quality time reveals true nature of people, and if you must unravel people’s pretence and hypocrisies, you need to give it time before making the decision on whom to marry. You need time to discover people’s strengths and weaknesses. Furthermore, you need quality time to confirm the veracity and wisdom of your decisions and to test the consistency of that person. You need time to make investigations and confirm the information they earlier gave you.
It is foolishness to buy a landed property without due diligent search of the property. You need to investigate the title of the land at the land registry before wasting your money to buy a lawsuit. That is why people write, “buyers beware” on their properties. If we are cautious about land matter, how much more marriage that is capable of making or destroying your destiny?
Excerpt from my book “EVIDENCE OF WRONG RELATIONSHIP”
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