Knowing family background of whom you want to marry

Some time ago, my wife, and I and the entire household headed to one of the private quiet Atlantic Ocean beaches in Lagos. We were 19 in number, including my grandchildren. It was pure family fun, full of playing, eating, horse-riding and playing by the waterside.

While the teenagers and those in their twenties among us were busy running up and down and having fun, at a stage, my wife went to the high rise pavilion we rented for our family with one or two people on the elderly side gisting and looking at the ocean. But I went to a place close to the water with a covering where I sat on a chair.

What I have written about so far is not the real reason for this article. But I am just adding all these to inspire families to create family fun during festive and non-festive periods. I am a very busy man. But as far as I am concerned, creating amusement for my wife, and all those that God brings under my roof is one of my priorities in life.

Now back to what happened at the beach. Aside our household, I am not sure there were up to fifteen other people there. The couples looked responsible. What caught my attention was a girl who was possibly seven years old cursing a nine-year-old boy that was possibly her elder brother.

For about five to 10 minutes, I heard her talking non-stop and at the top of her voice, saying: “big for nothing. It will not be well with you. You will walk and stumble all the days of your life…” A gentleman nearby who could not take it any longer had to ask her to stop. 

To her parents, it was a normal way of life. The point I want to make here is that, by the time this seven-year-old grows up to be a highly educated beautiful lady, the man who will marry her is likely to be in real hot pepper soup. She will curse him, curse his father, curse his mother, and curse his relatives and friends whenever she is frustrated or angry. It is not impossible, but it is not easy for such a person to change his or her ways in adulthood. 

In the quiet highbrow neighbourhood we lived, while we were still in Benin City, we heard the two teenage undergraduate sons of our neighbour shouting at their mother: “Keep quiet. You are just a woman.” The mother’s response was: “These things you are doing to me; your children will do them to you.”

Any responsible lady who marries any of these handsome boys is likely to have a tough time. She may not enjoy her man neither will she enjoy her mother in-law because lawlessness is the culture of the entire family. Only a lawless lady can fit in. Therefore, know whoever you want to marry to the family level.

A handsome man fell in love with a lady and they had a great wedding. Shortly after the wedding, the man started putting up strange behaviour, until he completely ran mad. It was after then she and her family members got to know that all the males in that family run mad and he was the last of the males in the family. If the lady and her family had carried out background checks, they might have taken a better decision whether to marry him or not. Shine your eyes. Look well before you say, “I do.” Love you.