The marriage institution – Part 16
Today, we conclude on the early warning signs of a failing marriage, which we must become proactive about. God designed marriage for the benefit of mankind. Marriage should not become a source of pain or bitterness, as it is meant to make couples better. Marriage is for synergy, which encompasses the cooperation of a man and woman under God, to build a stable family for the society. As aforementioned, these early warning signs include:
You Start Disconnecting Emotionally: The lack of empathy is further sign of a collapsing marriage. A marriage is made up of two people. Each person has an equal role in driving the relationship forward. But what happens if you stop empathising with your partner? Sometimes, you may start feeling that your spouse’s problems are not yours and begin distancing from him or her. Your partner might try to connect with you or share some issues, but you don’t want to get involved or give your opinion. This usually happens when one or both party feels their views are not being valued enough Proverbs 15:1-2.
Two Negatives Never Makes a Positive: Positive interaction between married couples is respectful and cheerful. Arguments will happen sometimes, however, the couple should not demean or be scornful of each other. If arguments with your spouse seem more like quarrels than the airing of differing opinions, then your marriage could be developing early cracks. A fight does not mean that there is a problem in your marriage, but constant negativity and hurtful arguments may indicate that you are both losing basic affection and regard for each other Proverbs 25:11
Your Spouse’s Absence Makes You Happier: Most happily married men or women await their spouse’s return from work and cherish each other’s company. Even though couples can have separate hobbies and friends, they still desire quality time with one another. But if you consistently feel relieved when your spouse is away, then it could be a sign that your marital relationship is starting to fizzle out Proverbs 18:24.
You Don’t Look Forward to a Brighter Future Together: Do you find yourself reminiscing about the times you once shared with your partner, but have no recent memories of happy togetherness? Married folks often make plans for their future and look forward to mutual growth and a prosperous life together. If it is otherwise, this may suggest a failing marriage Amos 3:3.
When Two Worlds Collide: Do you withhold stuff from your partner? Are you suspicious of your partner or unwilling to share your life’s details? Honesty is the key to developing a robust marriage bond and secrets can be devastating to any relationship. Not all marriages are made in heaven. It may be time to take a good hard look at your relationship with your spouse. Pay heed to the early warning signs of a failing marriage, and take firm steps towards restoring the old charm and warmth in your relationship again.
Ayo Daniels is a healthy family practitioner who writes from Lagos and will love to hear your feedback, questions, testimonies and attend to your counselling need: email@example.com