Experts have underscored the need to address the emotional, psychological, and social challenges confronting men.
They also challenged the stereotypes surrounding gender-based violence.

This was at the fourth annual stakeholders conference of the JASHABEL Touch-A-Heart Foundation (JTAH) held in Lagos on June 11, with the theme: “Masculinity, Vulnerability and Relationship Breakdown: Men, Why The Silence?”
The conference brought together policymakers, human rights advocates, mental health professionals, faith leaders, entertainers, and other stakeholders to discuss the emotional, psychological, and social challenges confronting men.

Renowned human rights activist Joe Okei-Odumakin revealed that nearly 1,000 of about 8,000 gender violence cases handled by her organisation involved male victims.

Oke-Odumakin said many men endure emotional trauma, financial burdens, abuse, and societal expectations in silence.

“When you see a silent man, you don’t know the weight he carries,” she said.
Drawing from years of advocacy work, she recounted cases involving men who suffered emotional and psychological distress, warning that unresolved trauma and suppressed emotions could result in tragic consequences for individuals and families.

She urged male victims of abuse to seek counselling and professional support instead of suffering in silence.
Chairman of the event, Chief Andy Boyo, challenged long-held perceptions of masculinity, saying many men had been conditioned from childhood to suppress their emotions and endure hardship without seeking help.

According to him, many men struggle with emotional pain, anxiety, depression, trauma, financial pressures, family challenges, and abuse but remain silent for fear of being perceived as weak.

He said the consequences of such silence are reflected in broken relationships, strained families, social isolation, addiction, mental health crises, and emotional despair.

“True strength is not pretending that pain does not exist. True strength is having the courage to confront it. True strength is being able to say, ‘I need help,'” Boyo said.

He stressed the need to build a society where men could openly discuss their struggles without fear of ridicule, adding that emotional wellness should be recognised as an essential part of healthy masculinity.

Delivering the keynote address titled “Broken Fathers, Broken Sons: The Hidden Cost of Fatherlessness on Men’s Mental Health, Trauma and Emotional Regulation,” Kingsley Obom-Egbulem said absent or emotionally unavailable fathers have profound effects on boys and men.

“Every society eventually pays for the fathers it produces,” he said.

Citing research findings, Obom-Egbulem said about 85 per cent of men surveyed indicated they did not want to replicate the type of relationship they had with their fathers when raising their own sons.

He attributed increasing cases of depression, substance abuse, emotional instability, and self-destructive behaviour among men to societal expectations that compel them to suppress emotional pain and man up.
According to him, boys require six critical elements for healthy development: presence, protection, affirmation, guidance, correction, and positive masculinity.

He called on fathers to become more involved in the lives of their children while urging men experiencing abuse or emotional distress to seek help and communities to establish support systems for vulnerable men.

Earlier, Executive Director of JASHABEL Touch-A-Heart Foundation, Comrade Mrs. Favour Benson, said the conference was organised after the foundation observed that many relationship challenges stem from emotional wounds that had never been addressed.

She noted that while interventions for women and girls remain important, attention should also be given to the emotional well-being of boys and men.
“As we worked with families, couples, young people and communities, we discovered that many relationship challenges are linked to emotional wounds that were never addressed,” she said.

Benson said empowering girls alone would not be sufficient if they eventually built families with emotionally wounded and unsupported men.
“A wounded man often struggles to maintain healthy relationships. A neglected boy can grow into a confused adult. A society that ignores the emotional well-being of men ultimately affects women, children, families, and communities,” she stated.

She emphasised that the initiative was not intended to compete with programmes for women and girls but to complement them by promoting healthier families through support for both genders.

Also speaking, the Lagos State Commissioner for Youth and Social Development, Mobolaji Ogunlende, announced plans by the state government to institutionalise a boy-child development initiative currently championed by the Office of the First Lady, Dr. Ibijoke Sanwo-Olu.

According to him, May 16 has been selected as a dedicated day for recognising and promoting issues affecting the boy child.
He said the initiative would be embedded within the Ministry of Youth and Social Development to ensure continuity irrespective of changes in government.

“We are here because of the boy child. We are institutionalising this initiative so that the boy child continues to be recognised and supported,” he said.
The conference also featured a panel session moderated by filmmaker Biodun Stephen, with panelists including Dr. Ray Echebiri, Dr. Becky Olorunpomi, Dr. Jude Osemudiamen, Barrister Kunle Afolabi, Mrs. Aderonke Oyelakin, and Mr. Damilare Adewusi.

The panel examined societal expectations placed on men and advocated raising boys with emotional intelligence, empathy, accountability, and healthy coping mechanisms.
Participants called on parents, educators, and community leaders to play active roles in nurturing emotionally healthy boys capable of growing into responsible and balanced men.

The event also featured contributions from comedian Atunyota Alleluya Akpobome (Alibaba) and veteran actor Paul Obazele, who both underscored the importance of addressing men’s emotional well-being.

As part of the conference, the JASHABEL Touch-A-Heart Foundation launched a magazine dedicated to advancing conversations on social development, family wellbeing, human rights and community transformation, while several individuals were honoured for their humanitarian contributions and commitment to social impact.