10 Tips To Enjoying Your Singleness
Being single can be quite depressing, especially in a world where finding love is also glorified as finding completeness. finding life. In a worst-case scenario, if you are pretty or handsome no one would believe your ‘single’ marital status. While others have seen being single as a form of loneliness, singleness can be a blessing.
After my past relationship, I stayed out of the dating game for two solid years and this made me discover my real self. The part where I knew my capabilities alone, where I did things and understood my personality. Oh, my! I must add that it was really difficult since I was from a tribe in Nigeria where it is believed a woman must marry early. But making a decision to pay attention to me helped me rediscover my life and made me realise that I didn’t need anyone to be part of my life to help me start my life again.
Today, I am convinced that there is nothing wrong with enjoying your singleness. What being single has taught me is wholeness. It helped me understand the scenario with being whole as a person. Here are 10 tips for enjoying your singleness:
Discover your personality
Most times, we presume we know ourselves, our strengths and shortcomings. One thing we forget is humans go through an evolving process. Your present state has about a 40% impact on what you become. Someone once said that human behaviour is influenced by nature and nurture. While being single, discover your innate desires, work on your temperament, and embrace having a good standing. This is the period you would have a grasp on your true self. And to start this process, you would need to tell yourself the truth.
Don’t be cynical, trust the process
Sincerely, this is a bit difficult. There were times my past relationship kept crawling back at me while being single. The whole romantic scenario that has played back then, the calls morning and night. The extra perks here and there, I almost wanted to break the process and just have what every other lady had; a boy who keeps them happy. Yet, I didn’t lose hope. I drew strength from my inner self and never fabricated fantasies. I just wanted to trust the process irrespective of not seeing anyone. Don’t lose hope — don’t create a self-fulfilling prophecy that you don’t want to become true.
Create your own happiness
You read that right! You are solely entitled to your happiness. You don’t need anyone to make you happy. Discover several ways to create your joy. Be your own lover and your friend.
Figure out what you want. What are your dreams, goals, desires, setbacks? Explore the little nervous things you do and why you do them. Explore all of it in a safe place. Who are you and what do you need to feel complete? You cannot expect that to come from another person — that’s all on you. Own it.
Focus on other relationships
After my past relationship, I realised that I had no or little friends. I had drifted a bit from family relationships, and this is quite common. When I became single, I started building it. This process made me realize that I had an inner energy that I didn’t explore. I used to be an introvert but being single made me an ambivert. Create that relationship with undivided attention.
Meet new people
I am admittedly awful at this. Meet people without the intention of making them a potential partner. Don’t create a fantasy. Talk to different people to understand what they are really saying and not what you think they are saying. Move out of your comfort zone. Throw away self-consciousness and enjoy the flow. Present your honest self, and trust me, you would realise that life is much more than being in a relationship.
Self-honesty is gold
Be honest with yourself. While enjoying your singleness, you would meet a lot of potential partners but this is the time to take caution. You are single, and not in a rush to feel a void. And If you meet someone you like, don’t treat the relationship as if the person is paying for your ex’s mistakes.
This is the time to try what you wouldn’t. In doing so, don’t mare your conscience. We all know what’s right and wrong.
The fact is that mistakes are lessons learned from experience. Don’t be scared to make that fall. “Still I Rise!” should be your slogan
Embrace your new self and know when it is time
The truth is you can be carried away with being single. True, you are enjoying your singleness. While this is great, be sensitive enough to know when it is time to move into another relationship. Don’t rush it; understand the times and seasons.
Being single is not a ticket to being mischievous. Don’t give up on love.