The Guardian
Email YouTube Facebook Instagram Twitter WhatsApp
Everything you need to live well

Are You in A Relationship or Just Fooling Around?

For some reason, defining a relationship is still a sore spot for some people. You date for a while and you start to wonder if you have something concrete or you’re just fooling around. But, instead of just asking and having the talk, you beat around the bush or avoid it entirely until something profound happens.

I don’t need to stress how important it is to communicate with each other and properly define the boundaries of your relationship. But, if you’re still uncertain about having “the talk” and really want to know what your status is, there are a couple of ways you can tell.


The Commitment Factor

Commitment is the primary factor to look to when wondering if you are dating someone or in a relationship. If you are seeing someone regularly and going out often, you should think about whether you are seeing each other exclusively, or if you are allowed to date other people as well. Being exclusive is usually indicative of having a concrete relationship with someone.

Get Your Expectations Right

How do you feel about the relationship you have with your partner? Sometimes you just need to look within yourself and decide if you are getting what you would want out of a relationship. Is the person you are currently involved with displaying potentials of a great long term partner? If you already feel as satisfied as you believe you would in a defined situation, maybe there’s no need to question any further.

Sometimes Words Speak Louder

In as much as you are avoiding having the talk, some statements should be indicative of what your status with your partner is. If the person you’re involved with sometimes makes anti-relationship statements like “Relationships are too much stress for me” or “I don’t really like the idea of being tied down”, then chances are you aren’t in a relationship with this person. Sometimes, you may say something suggestive of an actual relationship with this person. When you do, pay attention to the way he/she responds to your statement.

Conflicting Behavior

Sometimes you may already be aware that the person you are involved with isn’t interested in a relationship. You may have already made your peace with this and are enjoying dating this person as is. However, this person may start to do things you would expect from someone you are in a relationship with, like being possessive about you or suddenly emphasizing how you are the only person he/she is currently seeing. At this point, something in your dynamics may have changed and you should reevaluate your relationship.

Again, communication is key. If at any point of the dating process your stance is unclear to you, it is always best to talk it out. If for no other reason, do it to make sure you are on the same page at least.

Receive News Alerts on Whatsapp: +2348136370421