Breaking Free From Patriarchy

The marginalisation and oppression of women seem to be one point of convergence amongst all cultures in the world. History is littered with stories of women fighting for basic rights and an acknowledgement of their full humanity. In Nigeria, these tales are no different. The history of Nigeria and its becoming had a lot to do with women’s sacrifices, many of which had gone unacknowledged and undocumented. Until recently, whenever Funmilayo Ransome Kuti’s name is mentioned, I automatically think of her as the first woman to have driven a car in Nigeria. As groundbreaking as that may sound, she was much more than a woman who picked up a car key and took a ride. She was one of the Amazons that worked hard to ensure Nigeria was free from the claws of its colonial masters.

In a world of endless possibilities, where a person can be anything, women are still confined by cultural roadblocks and non-existent legal structures that should be available to protect and empower them. At a Senate hearing on March 1st, 2022, an overwhelming majority of Senators gleefully screamed ‘nay’ to bills that had to do with the introduction of Affirmative action for women in politics and expansion of the scope of citizenship by registration amongst other bills that had gender equality at its background. The sheer disregard of the full humanity of women by these Senators ought to go down in history as one of the greatest political betrayals of all time.

It is rather unfortunate that the story of the Nigerian woman today continues to be that of a struggle for recognition, but as bleak as that may sound, resilience is that rope that ties together each generation of women. One just has to look around to see a great number of Nigerian women succeeding despite the limited structures available to aid their success. Many women are becoming unapologetic in chasing after what they want in a world where a woman is criticised for being too much and chastised for not being enough. Women are redefining language in ways that feel personal to them. There are conversations on social platforms like Twitter where women reject adjectives like ‘strong’ in relation to them because they argue it is a worthless currency exchanged for women’s needless sufferings. More women are taking charge of their narratives and reassessing what they have always believed to be true about womanhood.

These are exciting times to be alive, to witness the many successful attempts of women freeing themselves from the shackles of patriarchy and refusing to be confined by laws that have refused to acknowledge their full humanity. All over the world, women are taking back the power they have relinquished for so long; more women are getting emboldened to call out sexual abuse, to protest unjust laws and even dare to assert themselves in leadership positions. Women have simply stopped asking for permission to exist and have started bringing their own chairs to tables they weren’t deemed worthy of an invitation.

Women are also rejecting societal pressure on them to act in certain ways that are acceptable, to speak in a particular manner, to sit in an acceptable way and to only hold opinions that do not contradict the status quo. The ways to be a good woman is similar across cultures and the rules are set in stone. Anything short of that automatically brands the defaulter as a ‘bad’ woman that won’t fall under the protection of the patriarchal system. The irony is that even ‘good’ women fall victim to this system that promises to protect them if they follow the rules. Laurel Thatcher Ulrich captured it perfectly when she said “well-behaved women seldom make history”, a vast majority of Nigerian women are appreciating their differences and realising the great amount of power that their diversity holds and women everywhere are saying in different languages, “we are here, we are loud and we are taking up spaces.”