Distance Relationship—Tips To Help You
Many people believe that long distance relationships are never going to work out. Presently, we record cases where parents discourage their children or loved ones from engaging in one due to the challenges involved. This norm has followed suit mostly in female friends where you find ladies advising their best friends to consider a relationship, but not to take it too seriously due to heart breaks.
Well said and factual. But just to think a little further on that, does it then mean distant relationship is never to be considered ever?
No doubt a lot challenges are associated with it as the case may be. Challenges like; Loneliness, distance, lack of togetherness, lack of warmth as desired and lots more. But hey, nobody says it is going to be easy. Even the closest of relationships encounter problems and huge ones at that. More so, people don’t intentionally set off for distant relationship just for the fun of it; it’s either done in pursuit of a better life which at the long run pays off for parties involved. Plus I also believe, such considerable distance relationships are time bound and temporal.
If you have found yourself in a distance relationship and you worry about how to keep love—warmth alive and strong, here are some tips to begin with, to make it work:
- See it as an opportunity
If you ever want to succeed in this part of life, you need to first believe in any time bound reason or goal that has kept your partner away and first and foremost see it as an opportunity than a threat. That is to say, in other to live together, you first need to learn how to live apart. So instead of thinking that this long distance relationship is pulling you two apart, you should believe that through this experience, the both of you will be bound together and even stronger. Because actually, if you ask me, I would rather be far from you, and feeling really close, rather be close to you but feel really far away.
- Set some ground rules to achieve your expectations
Both of you need to be clear with what it is you expect from each other during this long distance relationship. By setting ground rules, it’s a way of ensuring that none of you does things that will take the other party by surprise. For instance; Are you both in for this and if yes do you both agree with the time frame and if yes, do you both agree to wait for each other faithfully? This is to ensure that each party understands what is expected of them and the reason they rules are biding. It also helps you understand commitment level, what you stand to gain and at the same time, what you stand to lose and so on and so forth.
- Have a goal in mind
This option is slightly similar to the above but intended to help you achieve focus. Setting and knowing your goal is meant to help you both know that your waiting is not forever and is not in vain. Here, you might both need to discuss and agree on a few of these basic questions, which are; What do we want to achieve at the end of the day? How long are we going to be apart? What is in our future together? And many more. These are some important questions you two need to ask yourselves to ensure you are working in the same direction towards a future that includes one another.
- Try to communicate regularly and creatively
Greet each other “good morning” and “good night” every day, this is a must. Try to update your partner on your life and its happening, however mundane some of these little things may seem they help ignite warmth and sustain love. To up the game, send each other pictures, audio clips and short videos from time to time. By putting in this kind of effort, you make the other person feel loved and attended to. Update each other’s activity on social media regularly.
- Stay honest with each other
Talk about your feelings of fear, insecurity, jealousy, care and whatsoever. If you try to hide anything from your partner, that secret will sooner or later swallow you up from inside out or become a burden. Don’t try to deal with things all by yourself. Be open and honest with each other. Let your partner help you and give you the support you need always. It’s better to address and tackle problems head on than to only disclose it when it’s too late.
- Make out time to visit each other
The importance of visits during a long distance relationship cannot be over emphasized. Visits are never to be down played on, especially when the other party is in dire need of it. After all the waiting and yearning and abstinence, you finally get to meet each other to fulfill all the little things like hugging, holding each other’s hands, kissing, and keeping warmth, etc. which are all common to other couples but so very special and extra intimate for people in long distance relationships.
Finally, yes, you are alone but you are not alone, unless you choose to feel like it. You don’t have to let your world revolve around your partner. You can use this little time away from your partner to visit your friends, loved ones and family. More so, use this time to do some personal development skills for yourself; like obtain a degree, a certification, a training etc. Get a new hobby; gym, learn a skill, watch shows and all sorts. There are plenty of things you can do that don’t involve your partner and I can assure you, by the time you know it, the years are far spent and very well at that and you both will live to appreciate the decisions you both took when you finally re-unite.
I hope these little tips have enlightened you a bit, if yes, well there you go dearie, cheer up and live your life to the fullest!