By Segun Durowaiye

Literary nonsense
Sir: “A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.”

So the old rhyme tells us, and I hope that the wisest men are truly lined up for their current ration of it!

But that ancient rhymer was not the only one to express such an opinion. World famous social analyst, J.K. Galbraith, has this to say: “It is a far, far better thing to have a firm anchor in nonsense than to put out on the troubled seas of thought.”

And with this encouragement behind us, we can look at a few examples of literary nonsense.

One is the limerick. This is the kind of nonsense verse usually applied to the 5-line version based on the nursery rhymes of Edward Lear, and said to have got its name from the chorus, “Will you come up to Limerick?” Which was sung after extempore verses contributed in turn by members of a party.

One example is:
“There was a young lady in Niger
Who went for a ride on a tiger
They came back from the ride
With the lady inside
And the smile on the face of the tiger!”

And another nonsense verse very nearly a limerick but not quite is the following:
“I rode upon my Honda
Ruth rode aback of me
I hit a bump at fifty-five,
And rode on Ruth-lessly.”

“An Irish bull” is an expression containing a contradiction in terms, or employing a ludicrous inconsistency as in the notice of a village newspaper in Ireland before the feast day of Corpus Christi, “The procession will be held as usual in the monastery grounds on Thursday afternoon, but if it is raining in the afternoon, we’ll have to hold it in the morning.”

A less well-known form of literary fun is the spoonerism, called after an Oxford University Professor, the Rev. W. A. Spooner, who used to delight his young undergraduate audience by the way he tied himself up in verbal knots. This is an accidental transposition of initial letters of two or more words. As in, “He has just received a blushing crow, for (crushing blow) or “For real enjoyment, give me a good stretch of road and a well-boiled icicle.”

Or an example I once heard, myself in a sermon, “Jonas spent three days in the bale’s whelly.”

People use big words which they do not understand, but which they think sound impressive, often provide unwitting humour, as in the story of a farmer’s wife who tried to improve her husband’s vocabulary so that it would be at par with her own.

One of the prize possessions of this couple was a big he-goat or billy-goat.

His wife once a while would say, “Don’t say tale, say anecdote.”

And another bombastic and verbal acrobatics sensation was Mrs. Malaprop, where the word “Malapropism” was coined. She was an expert in the literary misuse of words and wrong pronunciations.

A writer or communicator must be very careful with reckless verbosity or pompous verbiage, so as not to confuse or mystify the readers. All the same, it falls in the category of literary nonsense and it is always funny to read.

Think about it.

Segun Durowaiye can be reached via 08055356855.