True story: How can I save this marriage?
I am not sure what solution I am looking for, but I feel like my husband is purposely trying to make me go “crazy.”
See, since the first day of our marriage four years ago, everything has gone down hill for us. He dramatically changed and did things to me, hurtful things, which almost ended in divorce.
Because we had a son at the time, we decided to work things out, and it seemed lately that we were finally able to see a possible future together, especially since we had child number two, to try to save our marriage (not a good idea, but still grateful for the child).
Anyway, just a couple of days ago, my husband told me that his therapist suggested for him to tell me the truth about something in his life, because he is a compulsive liar.
As he confessed, he informed me that everything that he ever told me about his life while we were dating, engaged, married for three years were lies; that all the wild life, girlfriends, etc that he claims to have had and his life experiences are fake. He invented everything about his past.
Now, he wants me to believe him. I have tried, I really have, but it just seems like something keeps nagging me, like no matter what something seems off.
Lately, I get the feeling that he is keeping another huge secret from me, I just don’t know if the feeling is true or it is just my reacting from what I just found out.
As of now, I am hurt and feel deceived, because I now know that I am completely married to a stranger.
I also feel angry and it is not fair that I made a life with a man that does not exist. I don’t know what to do. If I choose to believe him, then I will always wonder. Otherwise, I feel like making a fool of myself and try to investigate. But how does one investigate someone else’s past?
I am confused and don’t know what to do. I feel that after all he has done to me, I should just run as fast and far as I can with our children, but a part of me does truly love this man.
How will I be able to live past this? Is it possible to be able to trust him ever again? And should I trust my feelings that he may be having an affair or is keeping a deeper truth from me or is it just my emotions/anger/pain getting the best of me?
I feel like there is no one else who can understand what I am going through. I guess I feel all-alone. If you have ever known someone in this situation, what would you suggest?
Should I try to investigate, even if I humiliate myself in the process? What should I do?
I still wish to save our marriage, but how can I move past this?
If it helps in answering, he claims that he does not want to let me go; he wants to save our marriage, but he keeps lying to me regardless.
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