What is marriage? What is the divine perspective? When does a relationship between a man and a woman become real marriage in God’s sight according to God’s standard? We must go back to God to glean His original intentions for an original institution, so, as to follow His original plan. Sometimes, there are problems in marriage. This may be a problem of lack of finance or misunderstanding or delay in child bearing.

The Lord Himself is every clear as to the standard of marriage to follow in such circumstances. He still wants marriage to be for one man and one woman. God’s original intention for marriage is monogamy. No one living under God’s standard has two wives or two husbands. We don’t make marriage an experiment. The husband or wife of your youth should remain your husband or wife until death. Marriage is for better for worse, for richer or poorer, at the time of adversity and at the time of prosperity, in the day and in the night. It is for male and female and it is binding for life. That is the perspective of marriage in the sight of God.

Marriage is a sacred thing, it is not a game; it is not an experiment for childish carnal people. God has His perfect plan, and he is not just giving it to us today. That perfect plan has been in the mind of God since the foundation of the world. The children of Israel could not live by the standard God gave them. They thought that it was too high, too holy, too demanding for them because they have rebellion and stony hearts inside them. The result was that most of them just could not abide by the perfect standard of God. This then was the reason for the temporary permission given to them by Moses. They lived in permissive will of God because of the hardness of their heart. In the end, they paid dearly for it. And the Lord Jesus Christ did not mince words in correcting this aberration.

When two people come together it can be likened to spare parts of a vehicle bought from different manufacturers. When fixed together, there would be friction. That is reason you put engine oil all the time, to lubricate all the different parts of the vehicle. When they are married, they are joined together to build a home with their children and embark on a journey that might run into turbulence sometimes. They, therefore, need the oil of the holy Ghost, without which there will be friction in the relationship. This is what enables them to follow what the Bible says, and fight off the temptation to file for divorce. For couples to live together is the perfect will of God.

Some years ago, some believers went out to evangelise their community. They met a man who readily repented and accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Saviour. Soon after he was born again, they taught him about the standard of God on marriage. He informed them that his wife had moved out of their home, and he did not know where she was or how to find her. They advised him to take the matter to God in prayer, assuring him that God knows her address.

On another day, the same group of Christians went out to preach the gospel in another part of the town. Remarkably and unknown to them, one of the people they spoke to was the estranged man’s wife. She became converted, and also raised the question of how she was going to find her husband from whom she had been separated for more than ten years. They assured her that there was nothing impossible for God to fix; she should only continue to trust God. As the man became regular to church, so did the woman. One day, at the end of the service, they ran into each other. They were reunited and reconciled. They promptly and happily moved in together again.

What concrete steps are needed for couples to stay together and preserve marriages?
1. There should be satisfaction with each other.
2. There should be separation from all others.
3. They should practice sacrificial love for each other.
4. They should show sympathy towards each other needs.
5. There should be submission in a meek and humble spirit.
6. They should make regular supplication to God for each other.
7. They should practice spiritual, daily devotional worship together.
• Further reading (King James Version): Isaiah 55:8,9; Proverbs 14:12; Romans 16:17,18; Galatians 1:6-9; 2 Corinthians 11:13-15; 2 Timothy 4:1-5; John 5:22; 12:46-48. Matthew 19:4, Genesis 2:24; 1 Corinthians 7:2; Matthew 19: 27-29; Proverb 5:18; Malachi 2:14; 1 Corinthians 7:39. Hebrews 12:19; Ezekiel 36:24-27; Matthew 5:31; 19:7,8; Mark 10:7-11; Matthew 19:10. Matthew 19:4-6.