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While she is waiting to get married

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Charles Ighele


I met my wife, Carol for the very first time in my life when she was 28 years old, and I married her when she was twenty-nine. 

She was full of life. She was full of positive energy unlike some other girls her age who were not yet married.  She was not embarking on three weeks of fasting and prayer, or four days of dry fasting in order for her husband to come. Not that she was not praying, but she never panicked in prayers. 

It’s not as if men were not coming. Being the daughter of the very quiet and honest Bishop Michael Marioghae, drew many suitors to her. 

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Her younger brother married before her, while her elder sister had already given birth to four children. She was living with her parents at age 28, while working with one of the then four leading banks in Nigeria. 

In church, she was the president of the youth fellowship. She was also a Sunday school teacher. She would take public transport to cover the long distance between her bank, her home, and the church in order to meet up with the Sunday school preparatory class on Saturdays.

She would organise the youths and take them out on picnics. Some of the unmarried females of her age in the church felt too embarrassed, proud, or both to be dancing in church with younger people.

Many of the males didn’t mind. But many females felt they ought to be in their husband’s houses and not to dance out with youths to the altar when it was the turn of the youths to do so during thanksgiving, and other church events.

Some could not imagine themselves dancing and being happy when younger females were cuddling their babies, and sitting beside their husbands. Some felt ashamed, but not Carol.

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She never had a boyfriend, neither did it occur to her because of her deep and genuine relationship with her God. But she thoroughly enjoyed her years as a single lady. 

I met her at 28 enjoying living with her parents, and relating with them. I met at 28 thoroughly enjoying her work as a banker; I met her at 28 happy teaching her Sunday school class every Sunday morning before the Sunday service; I met her at age 28 full of joy that she was the president of the youth fellowship of her church; I met her at age 28thoroughly enjoying her being single.

I met her at age 28 being the chief bride’s maid to almost all her friends. She never complained, nor murmured about her being single. She never believed that being single should make a single lady to be singled out for sympathy. Her faith was strong that the kind of man that will give her peace will come. Her faith brought me her way, not her fears.

I am saying that being single is not a disease because it is not against nature. It’s a stage of life that one may step out from early, or a little late in life. Enjoy it! Love you.

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In this article:
Charles Ighele
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