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Mitigating against marital pressures in 2020


Marital pressures are those things that threaten the peace and stability of any marriage, which if unresolved, can lead to the collapse of the home.

It is important to emphasise that marriage is the indispensable foundation upon which all homes are built. If a marriage collapses, the home collapses and invariably, the society also collapses.
Some common marital pressures:

• The Pressure of money (finance): All over the world, it’s been shown that money is the primary reason divorce happens. The pressure of money escalates, when couples begin to have children and the cost of taking care of them becomes a challenge. To mitigate this, couples are advised to draw up a financial budget for the year. List all envisaged expenses in one column and expected income on another column. A quick look will show if your projected income will be able to match your expenditure. If your income falls short of expenditure, you may need to cut down on some expenditure or look for cheaper alternatives. Another way to mitigate money pressures is to look for ways to increase the family income.

• Career Pressure: For many couples, living in big cities like Lagos is a very serious challenge. The man works in a bank, while the wife works in a multinational company, and they have to be on their way to work at 6 am every morning, only to return late at night. They rely on third parties to help cater for their children and at the end of the day; they hardly know their kids. One way to handle this problem is to decide that one of the partners look for a job that will afford him or her quality time with the kids.

• The distance pressure: Nowadays, there are many couples living apart, due to job or business considerations. The man lives in Abuja because he is a Federal civil servant, while the wife lives in Lagos. Such separation has led to the break-up of many a home, and you will do well to ensure that this doesn’t pose a problem to your home this 2020. My advice is that the wife moves over to join the husband wherever he is, if possible.

• House Rent/School Fees Pressures: If you’re a tenant in any of the big cities, you’re likely to pay your house rent yearly and many couples struggle with this. My advice is that, if for example your yearly rent is N200, 000, that means you pay approximately N16, 700 per month. If you save this amount every month, at the end of one year, you will have your rent complete and avoid the embarrassment that landlords usually give their tenants.

The same goes for school fees. If you save your children school fees over time, when it’s time to pay, you will not need to struggle or beg. I also strongly advise that you join a thrift contribution, as a way of compulsory savings this year. One benefit of this is that, when it is your turn to collect, you have all your projected savings intact.

There are other marital pressures couples go through, but these are the very common ones, which you need to address in 2020 for your marriage to experience bliss. God bless you!

• Enquiries: Elshaddai Covenant Church, 7, Social Club Road, Off Charity Road, Abule Egba. Tel: 08080929292 (Calls only); 08182281184 (WhatsApp messages only).

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