Five Tips On How To Deal With A Narcissist Boss
Research shows a large number of narcissists who become leaders. A lot of people has either worked for a narcissistic boss or been exposed to one in some capacity.
If you’re unlucky to have one of these people as a manager someone who’s candidly self-absorbed, self-admiring, self-centred and self-obsessed–someone who works hard only when someone’s watching, it may be no consolation that you’re in good company. So how do you stay sane? What’s the best way to reduce the impact of your boss’s self-centred behaviour?
1. Understand Them: To cope with your narcissistic boss, you have to understand them. The odds are very high that they’re never going to change, and they’re never going to be easy to work with.
2. Don’t allow them to get under your skin: Narcissists thrive on getting a rise out of someone–especially someone they feel they have power over. They will blame you, shame you, call you out, embarrass you and humiliate you, but you don’t have to allow any of it to get under your skin. Use emotional intelligence to manage your thoughts and actions. And remember that any cruel behaviour and words reflect badly on the narcissist, not you.
3. Fact check everything: A narcissist will always portray themselves as a victim who’s innocent in all aspects. When the truth offends them–which is often–they’re quick to exchange it for lies and half-truths. If you’re dealing with a narcissistic boss, be ready to do a lot of checking up.
4. Don’t argue: The last thing you want to do is argue with a narcissist because everything you say and do will be held against you. Don’t argue or engage but instead make them invisible–the last thing a narcissist wants. It’s impossible to argue with someone who’s willing to distort the truth to suit their own agenda–the best you can do is to take away their power by making them unimportant and invisible.
5. Tend to your self-esteem: One of the most important things you can do in this situation is take care of yourself. After all, working for a narcissist can be a demeaning and stressful experience. So why not take care of yourself after all the stress.- go see a movie, eat dinner out for once or better still remember you’re at least gaining valuable experience in dealing with one of the most difficult personalities you’re ever likely to encounter.