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Finding the right partner in marriage – Part 5


James O. James

So far we’ve been looking at the importance of marrying the right person; what needs to be in place and seeking God’s guidance or leading through various means.

Today, we shall be looking at confirming God’s leading. Matthew 18:16b says, “Out of the mouth of two or three witnesses every word (of God) may be established”. The principle here is that God expects you to confirm his leading by passing it through other sources because if it’s of God, the results will be consistent.

It’s also necessary to double check what we perceive as God’s leading to avoid human error. The following ways will help you do just that.
The Acid Test Of God’s Word

Every revelation that contradicts the written word of God is a lie! God exalts His word above even His name (Psalm 138:2), therefore, He is so thoroughly consistent that His will never negates His word. Any dream, vision, inward witness, etc., that contradicts any part of the word of God CANNOT be from God no matter how spectacular it is. For instance, if you’ve a seemingly spectacular leading to marry a person who is not born again, you don’t even need to consider it. The Bible clearly teaches against this in 2 Corinthians 6:14.
Through The Leading Of Spirit-Filled Christians


The Bible in Proverbs 24:6 says, “in multitude of counselors (witnesses) there is safety”. When you receive a leading, always endeavour to pray for its confirmation through the counsel of trusted Christians. If God is truly speaking to you, He must be able to say the same thing to at least another dependable Christian.

Declare Fasting And Prayers
Spending time before God in prayer and fasting eliminates the following:
• The possibility of your ‘leading’ being influenced by pity.
• The possibility of your ‘leading’ being triggered off by a fake ‘prophecy’ given by someone about whom you should marry.

Never marry out of pity. It never works. Marriage can only be oiled by love, not pity. As for prophecy, let it only serve to confirm what God has already laid in your spirit.

The Test Of Time
Time has a way of settling a lot of things. Time will deflate infatuation. Also, falsehood hardly stands firm with the passage of time. Don’t propose to any one in a hurry and don’t give an answer without pondering it till you’re absolutely convinced. Wait, watch and pray. Infatuation wants it now but true love is patient.

The “Green Light” Or “Peace Of God” Factor
“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as member of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful” (Colossians 3:15 NIV).

If God is in the relationship you want to enter into, you’ll be in perfect peace at every consideration of it or when you bring it up before the LORD. Philippians 4:6-7 also confirms this position.

The Test Of Love
Apart from all these tests and checks, also evaluate whether you’re truly in love with your intended spouse or not. When God leads you to someone, He’ll also plant love in your heart for the person. This should never be compromised. Emphasis here is on LOVE, not infatuation or lust. Culled from my book – “The Missing Rib”!
Enquiries: Elshaddai Covenant Church, 7, Social Club Road, Off Charity Road, Abule-Egba. Tel: 08080929292 (Calls only); 08182281184 (Whatsapp messages only).


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James O. James
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