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A tale of two bridges

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Nkem Onwudiwe


There’s something about Bridges. They lead us to and through different paths, they connect us from point A, to point B. Usually built over something to create a transitional passage, bridges are very useful. However, some do more harm than good, I’ll tell you why.Not every bridge concerns a human connection; some are connected to habits and addictions. Those are the bridges I’d like you to burn to ashes today.

It’s a New Year and as usual, we make resolutions -well, a good chunk of us. We reflect on the year that was and the people in it. The trials, the triumphs and everything in-between. The period between the end of the year and the beginning of a new year is usually the time (especially on social media) people send signals, warnings, cryptic posts anticipating the “cut off” season.

Each time I come across such posts on Instagram, I can’t help but roll my eyes and mutter to myself, “Not Again” but hey.. to each his/her own right? While it’s not a bad thing to cut off people who no longer “serve” you, in essence burning down bridges and its hinges, I believe the bridges that connect us to certain bad habits, toxic traits, distractions, and addictions should get all the smoke and all the heat!

The Bridges that lead to procrastination and self- doubt. The bridges of envy and unproductivity. The bridges that connect us to areas in our lives that do us more harm than good… those are the bridges we should set ablaze. You see, I’ve realised that often- times, people take the “easy route” of blaming other people and pointing fingers everywhere else but to themselves and, as I walked across the bridge that led me from 2019 to the New Decade, I thought why don’t we flip the script and instead of burning bridges that connect us to people, let’s burn the bridges that connect us to the bad habits and all.

Perhaps, if we no longer commute those bridges and nurture them, we would focus on working towards being better human beings. I’m not leaving myself out of this, I am still a work in progress, as are you.

So as you read this, I hope you take the time to revisit burnt bridges, re-evaluate and possibly, rebuild. According to my friend, Remi Owadokun: “Sometimes, you are the bridge.” And I absolutely agree so if we are cutting off and burning any bridges this new year, let it be the bridges that do not serve our goals towards personal development because the most valuable bridge you could ever build/nurture is the bridge of Genuine Human Connections.

Nkem Onwudiwe is the founder of Her Network – A Global Inspirational and Lifestyle Platform created to inspire and encourage all women to stand in their greatness and set real-life examples by living their truth.


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Nkem Onwudiwe
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