The Guardian
Email YouTube Facebook Instagram Twitter WhatsApp

Every fire needs re-kindling!


The problem with wanting to be up there alone, while everyone else is down here, is that life (being as unpredictable as it is) will always spring a surprise on us.

You just never know where it can pick its ace from and sometimes, the very things you could have helped to turn around positively (when you could but did not) are the very things that may spell doom for you when the chips are down.You never know when there will be a need for others to watch your back.

Now, what happens when those who should watch your back are way, way down there, to be of any use to you?
Yet, these are people you could have given a hand to come up the ladder but you were too myopic (from selfishness) to think of tomorrow.In choosing to be a lone star, you also stand a chance of fading out sooner than imagined because stars actually make a brighter constellation when there are lots of them.I also believe they find strength and support when they are surrounded by one another.


As a human, don’t you feel strengthened when you are surrounded by friends and relatives or people of like minds?
The beauty of life is its unpredictability, especially when we become peacocks, carrying on as if we have it all and nothing can ever go wrong.You never can just tell when you will need those you never gave a chance most; those you refused to help when you could.Where you should ordinarily have a smooth sail, an awkward situation arises because your actions/inactions have all come home to roost.

Back then in school, there were certain courses I was fond of reading extensively, usually one tests her mastery of such courses by leading the discussion of related topics with colleagues. I did that once and when it seemed others had yet to catch up with the topics I had read, I chose to hoard my knowledge and only offered to coach an acquaintance briefly and half half-heartedly too…I did not give her much points.

Another close friend stopped by and took me up on the said course (apparently she had gone to read it extensively too), we discussed some topics at length, exchanging ideas and examples, I found myself pouring out whatever I could to her and she did same too.At the end of the day, I learned a lot from her, her approach was a more simplified one and we gave examples with everyday incidents.

Need I tell you that when it was time for examination on the said course, that most of what I could remember came from that discussion I had with the fellow?
In fact, the examples we exchanged were more ingrained in my memory than the earlier points I was hoarding.
…those seemed to have flown out of the window!


You can imagine what would have been my fate if I had not had that discussion before the exam, or worse still if I had found myself being seated next to the lady I taught half-heartedly?
Of course, she would have given me back what I gave to her…if she remembers any at all!
If my understanding was broadened by the exchange I had with the other fellow, such that the earlier points I was hoarding became vague during examination, it goes to show that sharing remains the larger and surer way to expansion.I did very well in the examination eventually but the whole incident also taught me a big lesson about wanting to be up there alone.If I had taken the pains to tutor the other friend well, she would be in a better position to help out when my memory needed a jolt. Selfishness is appealing when we are not at the receiving end of life’s ‘whip’ but let’s just pray that the tables do not turn against us, in any form. Because, then we will know that the only thing those in need require is help.

Every fire needs re-kindling, no matter how fierce a fire seems, it does burn out eventually and if it fails to be re-kindled, it goes off completely. However we want to look at it, life has made us in such a way that we all need to have someone watch our back. It’s not clear at what point (in life) your back will need to be watched most.What matters most is that you do not shut the door you are most likely to pass through again.…if unsure, please leave that door slightly ajar. And treat everyone as your potential ‘back watcher’!


In this article:
Chukwuneta Oby
Receive News Alerts on Whatsapp: +2348136370421

No comments yet