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Sour, sweet & pain

By Diamond Woman
02 July 2016   |   1:19 am
My journey as TK’s wife hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park. Our honeymoon in the south of France for seven days was heavenly. We really bonded and had a great time.
Diary of a bored Housewife

Diary of a bored Housewife

My journey as TK’s wife hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park. Our honeymoon in the south of France for seven days was heavenly. We really bonded and had a great time. I didn’t hear from Emeka and Banke after the wedding. My brother and his family went back to the States and I had to settle into married life all by myself.

The fact that I was pregnant made it even worse. I felt so depressed and alone until I met my dear friend and sister…Linda. One afternoon, I looked into the mirror and I didn’t recognize myself. I was darker and I had put on weight. TK had been traveling so frequently and I could see why he was never at home. I had let go of myself. I wasn’t looking good so I wasn’t feeling very confident and it was affecting our relationship also knowing Banke had been instrumental to TK’s proposal,  made me feel like he didn’t love me and I was gradually withdrawing from him.

That day, I decided to do something about my appearance, so I dragged myself to a salon a few blocks from the house. That was where I met Linda. Salon Attendant: What do you want to do ma?Me: Please just cut the hair or something. Salon Attendant: Ma what kind of style do you want to cut? Me: Just a low cut… no style, just cut it. Linda was sitting on the chair next to me and she interjected Linda; Please don’t cut this your fine hair o. I wish my hair was like your own.

I forced a smile and didn’t respond, I was hoping she would get the message. She ignored my cold response and continued.
Linda: I understand. I have been through this four times. Don’t make any hasty decisions the discomfort will pass soon. Braids usually helps, there’s no need to brush your hair every morning. Me: Thank you.

I was hoping she would get the message and let me make my hair in peace, she kept talking and after a while I began to find some of what she was saying useful. She gave me tips to help me deal with cravings, nausea, insomnia and all the symptoms I complained about. I discovered we lived down the road from each other and very soon we were going shopping together and booking spa treatments…Linda was so easy to confide in, we soon became friends. She was also a housewife so she was good company.

While my relationship with Linda blossomed, my relationship with my husband was fast becoming extinct. As I entered the second trimester of the pregnancy and started showing, TK insisted on sleeping in separate bedrooms because he didn’t want to disturb me while he worked late at night. As a result, we would go weeks without him even touching me he always made sure I had everything I needed and was financially well taken care of but I had no one to talk to except Linda who was always willing to listen. Eventually, six months into our marriage it was time for me to go to America. I was to stay with my brother and his family until l I had the baby. The night before I left I decided to talk to my husband about the situation of our marriage Me: TK, please can

I talk to you?
TK: Of course! Are you ok?
Me: Not really

TK: What’s the matter? Have you been keeping your ante-natal appointments?
Me: No it’s not that. The baby is ok. It’s us not the baby.

TK: What’s wrong with us?
Me: I don’t think this is how a marriage should be. We don’t spend time together, you don’t touch me, and we don’t talk. I hardly know where you are or what is going on with you. It’s funny that I felt closer to you when I was your personal assistant than I do now as your wife. TK: So whose fault is that? Me: I don’t know but I have tried my best. I thought maybe the pregnancy was taking its toll on me so I tried to take care of myself and look better for you. I try to initiate conversation, try to make sure I personally prepare and serve your meals. I feel like a piece of furniture. Since we got back from the honeymoon, you have treated me like your sister.

TK: Not like you even deserve to be treated like my sister! Me: What did I do TK? Why are you so distant? I know you are not in love with me but you promised to try your best to make me happy. TK: That was before I found out that you lied to me! Your lover from the past came and made you a proposition and you hid it from me. Or did you think I won’t find out? Me: I knew your mother would tell you about what she heard. But I married you TK. I married you!

TK; you married me because I was the better option, admit it! You married me for my money!  I thought you were different, you are like the rest of them. You probably didn’t take the money my mother offered you because you were looking at the bigger picture. Why take the golden egg when you can have the goose that lays the eggs?

I couldn’t believe we were back here having this conversation again! Me: I can’t believe we are back here…having this conversation. I’m so hurt. I chose you because I wanted to give you the chance you asked for, I wanted to give my child the complete family I never had, and I believed we could make this work. Not because of your money!

TK: So why did you hide it from me? Why didn’t you tell me? Do you know how foolish I felt hearing it from my mother? I am sure you can imagine the smirk on her face the day she told me with all pleasure. I knew I had wronged him and I had to fix it. He was my husband and I should have told him especially when I realized the Duchess knew about Emeka’s visit the night before the wedding. I didn’t know what to do so I got on my two knees and for the first time I addressed my husband in Yoruba Me: Olowo Ori Mi, Ade ori mi … jor ma binu (The one who has paid my dowry, the crown of my head…I’m sorry). TK: That apology is six months too late Anjola. With that my husband left me kneeling there and walked away.

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