‘Peace of the home is critical to our performance in life’
She is also a life strategist, whereby she helps people in different areas in their life, particularly in making strategic decisions in terms of marital, family, business careers etc. In this interview, she speaks to DANIEL ANAZIA on why she prefers to call herself a life strategist instead of a life coach.
Why the shift from life coach to a life strategist?
AS a life strategist, what I do actually is to analyse people’s situation based on what they tell me, then give them strategies on what to do based on the scripture. It is more like a direct abstract on how to respond to situations.
When it involves a marital issue, they tell me what they want after which we begin to end demands. So what I basically do as a life strategist is to know what you really want, and then I begin to give strategies on how to navigate the outcome.
Is there any difference between a life coach and life strategist?
I have never called myself a life coach. A life coach takes on people and grooms them, but what I do is more than life coaching because it’s targeted at a situation. I give out strategic options but it turns out that the outcome most people want, they are not willing to pay the price for it.
So, what I do first is to engage them to observe their seriousness before I proceed to working with them.
As a life strategist, what are some of those things you have seen in people that are everyday challenges or problem in Nigeria?
Let’s use marriage for instance, a lot of marital issues. The peace of the home is so critical to our performance in life. If the home front is like a viper’s nest, you can never be effective in your work. Reason we see a lot of people who go home late or do a lot of things.
So the first thing I tell people who come to me with such issue is to be willing to endure suffering and tell whichever party who come to me to act like the fool to get what you want.
I will get you to understand that peace is what you are looking for and ensure that you are willing to do certain things to acquire that peace.
A lot of times it’s about who’s right and who’s wrong but I have seen that a good strategy that should be adopted and adapted to- suffer pain and let go knowing that if I suffer temporarily, I should be able to get the result I want.
For instance, lets assume a marital relationship whereby a husband spends money and doesn’t carry the wife along with the finances, and according to the scripture, ‘two shall become one’, which means that the man and the woman are supposed to be one financially.
This doesn’t require them owning a joint account but they should be able to open up to each other on their financial dealings. Life feels to be more easier when we put others first, and another way of putting this is emotional intelligence. So, rather than respond the way I was supposed to, I am going to hold back just to get what I want. Every word that Jesus said in the scriptures is all strategies to live a better and successful life.
A lot of young people are beclouded with so many challenges.
As a life strategist, how do you think they can survive in a harsh economy like Nigeria?
Aside from giving people empowering tools to have a better life, I have also looked particularly into the challenges of the society because it’s something I am very passionate about.
I have a NGO foundation called HADASSAH Women Empowerment Initiative, and we recently formed a group called Catalyst for African Societal Advancement (CASA) and it’s all about looking into the society most especially women because statistics shows that over 70 percent of women in Nigeria are living below poverty level.
What we do in HADASSAH is that we adopt a family living below poverty level and that family gets N5, 000 welfare aid and food supply monthly. With this kind of initiative, what we need to do is form a transparent group with people who are self-disciplined instead of waiting for Bill Gates to come offer help.
Do you think Nigeria will be better if she adopts and implements the CASA initiative?
During my study of low-income level, women empowerment and sufferings, I realised that government have something in place and written but it had not been implemented as a result of the society we live in. A lot of people are in government for their own pocket.
The funds released don’t really get to the hands of the grassroots people, who need them. I think that if government is willing to fix these challenges, the agencies must be transparent with the grassroots, and I am sure if this is done, we will not have such problems anymore, and even it exists, it will be very minimal.
There are a lot of organisations that have what it takes to eradicate this national problem, and they are willing to work with the government. They should be sought out and be empowered to get the job done.
There are so many NGOs in the country and a lot of them are not genuine, don’t you think this have in a way made government skeptical working with them in Nigeria?
The fact that there are crooks out there doesn’t mean that there are no original people. I have been working my NGO since five years and I make bold to say that I have never taken a dime as salary.
My husband and I put the money there and we also have members who make contributions ranging from NI, 000 and above because at the end of the day we spend much more than the money they put.
Some of us are doing this work as a call and not business. It is an assignment and I feel like a steward; so I owe it to God. When I started HADASSAH I never knew it would be referred to as an NGO; I opened it as an empowerment organisation until a lot of people said I have to register it with the government as an NGO to be regulated.
What is the agenda behind HADASSAH? Are you planning to run for a political office?
There are a lot of things happening out there; everybody is suspicious of everybody because they think everyone must have an agenda behind whatever they do.
My first calling was as a pastor; so I took this as part of my pastoral work but two years ago I resigned as a pastor from my local assembly (church) and became a normal member at a neutral church just to be able to do what I am doing.
So I don’t have any agenda for politics because it is going to distract me in what I have been called to do.
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