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Why relationship fails: Pre-marital sex – Part 1


Solomon Ojigiri

For several weeks, we have been taking about reasons why relationships especially courtship fails to metamorphosed into a holy wedlock. Actually, we have talked about so many reasons but today, we want to consider one of the most critical of them, which is pre-marital sex or sex before marriage. The truth is that several people do not even know that this is wrong at all. Some erroneously believe that once they start courtship or once they are getting married they are free to have sex together. Worse still, some even believe that the lady must be pregnant before they can get married to her. It is nothing but an expression of moral bankruptcy and gross ignorance, which pervades our society today. Aside the fact that it is morally wrong, it is also not Biblical and without any doubt, it is one of the major reasons why many relationships no longer result into marriage. It is nothing but building on a wrong foundation and walking in flagrant disobedience to the Word of God. We can avoid sex before marriage, regardless of the moral decadence of this generation. We were taught many years back that it was a very big shame or a reproach on the entire family, when a lady is not found as a virgin after wedding.  


Today, people celebrate monumental moral decadence in the name of civilisation. Whether you are a man or a lady, God wants you to keep your virginity till you get married. That is one of the greatest gifts you can give your spouse on your wedding night. Some men erroneously assume that they can live a careless life before marriage, since they cannot be pregnant, but they do not remember the fact that having children outside wedlock can be a catastrophe and it can be very shameful.  In fact, having sex around as a man outside wedlock is like a rehearsal for divorce in your future and what you sow is what you reap. There are men that had been forced to marry against their will or choice because they got someone pregnant. Some men will never love to consider a lady for marriage, once they see her as a sex partner. Just like the popular adage, “why buy the cow when you can get the milk free.”

Conversely, some ladies erroneously assume that they can get a man committed or force him or tie him down or keep them to themselves with sex. What some of them do not really realise is the fact that there are many men today who are just Casanova. They are just hungry and thirsty for sex, but they are not in any way prepared for the responsibility of marriage. All they are looking for is to have sex with a particular lady a few times, and then they will look for an excuse to discard their victims and move on to the next casualty. They do all those things with all impunity because some do not really know the consequences, while some simply take delight in hurting ladies. Some also take undue advantage of matured Singles who are desperately in search of who to marry. That is why no single should appear desperate, no matter your age. People can smell your desperation and they are ready to take advantage of you.
Rev. Solomon Julius Ojigiri, Everwinning Faith Ministries Int’l. 73/77, Everwinning Faith Avenue, White Sand, Isheri Osun, Festac Extension, Lagos. 08023997277 or or


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