Chinwe Kalu is a seasoned Relationship, Marriage, and Family Counsellor with a deep passion for guiding individuals and couples toward fulfilling, God-centred relationships. As the CEO of Corporate Wellness Services Ltd., she is at the forefront of promoting work-life balance, stress management, and family wellness in Nigeria’s corporate space. Chinwe holds a Bachelor’s degree in Chemistry and an MBA from the University of Lagos. She mentors and counsels young women, helping them navigate personal growth, relationships, and singlehood with wisdom and faith. In this interview with GERALDINE AKUTU, she shares her journey into women and youth advocacy amongst other salient issues.
What led you into advocating for women and youths?
My journey into advocating for women and youth was deeply personal and shaped by my own experiences. As a young woman navigating life, career, and relationships, I encountered challenges that tested my faith, resilience, and sense of purpose. I realized that many women and young people struggle with similar issues—whether it’s finding identity and self-worth, making the right relationship choices, balancing career aspirations with personal life, or overcoming setbacks and disappointments. I believe that God allowed me to go through certain experiences so that I could help others.
Over the years, I have counselled and mentored many women and young people, guiding them to make informed decisions, build strong values, and cultivate healthy, God-centred relationships. My passion also stems from the reality that women are at the heart of families, and strong, empowered women contribute to strong marriages, families, and communities. When women are equipped with the right knowledge, support, and faith-based principles, they can navigate life’s challenges with confidence and purpose.
Similarly, young people—especially in today’s world—need guidance, mentorship, and wisdom to make the right choices early in life. Many are struggling with the pressures of society, career decisions, and relationship challenges. I feel called to stand in the gap, offering them the counsel, encouragement, and truth they need to thrive. This is why I have dedicated myself to writing books, counselling, and creating platforms where women and youth can receive practical guidance, emotional support, and spiritual wisdom. Seeing them grow, make better choices, and build fulfilling lives gives me great joy and fulfillment.
What is your take on mentorship and how do you think it can solve the Gen Z problem?
Mentorship is one of the most powerful tools for shaping the next generation. It provides young people with the guidance, wisdom, and accountability they need to navigate life’s challenges and make informed decisions. Gen Z is growing up in a world that is more connected yet more confusing than ever—social media pressures, identity crises, and the temptation for quick success make it easy for them to lose their way. This is why intentional mentorship is crucial. Many young people today lack proper direction and positive role models. Mentorship bridges this gap by connecting them with experienced individuals who can offer practical advice, moral guidance, and career direction. It helps them avoid costly mistakes and understand that success requires discipline, hard work, and patience.
Effective mentoring is the only way to battle the bombardment from social media of images of overnight success, wealth, and fame. Mentors provide reality checks by sharing their own journey—the struggles, failures, and lessons behind real success. This helps young people develop a growth mindset and learn that true success is built over time. Mentoring also encourages value-based living rather than searching for identity from drug abuse, cultism, and internet fraud, by instilling core values like integrity, discipline, and resilience. It helps them see that their self-worth isn’t tied to material possessions or peer approval. Mentoring also helps to bridge the knowledge and even opportunity gaps. It is clear that our education system is not adequately equipping young people for the corporate world or entrepreneurship. This leaves many young people struggling to find their paths to meaningful living because they don’t know what opportunities exist or how to access them.
Mentorship opens doors by connecting them to career and business opportunities, teaching them relevant skills and helping them discover their unique talents, strengths and purpose- These times are also very stressful times. My children are dealing with much more than I had to when I was their age. So mental health challenges like anxiety, depression, and loneliness are things they are continually having to deal with. Mentors encourage them, hold them accountability, and provide emotional stability. Having someone to talk to can prevent them from making destructive choices and help them develop emotional intelligence and resilience. Mentorship delivers results when they are structured. All responsible adults mentor the young people in their spaces. However, we need structured mentorship programs in schools, workplaces, and faith communities to give young people consistent guidance.
Talk about your growing experience. What role did faith play in your upbringing?
I grew up in a home marked by dysfunction and constant tension. My parents were not divorced, but there was always rancour and hostility in the air. At some point, they separated, and although they later reconciled, they never lived together again. As a child, I had to keep moving between the two of them, never fully experiencing the warmth of a united family. Although, my parents were Christians, their relationship did not reflect the harmony and love that faith is meant to bring into a home. There was no real foundation for a stable family life. But in the midst of it all, God preserved me. He planted in me a deep awareness of what was right, even before I fully understood what it meant to walk with Him. Then, at the right time, He came for me. I truly embraced my faith at the age of 23, after a painful breakup that left me searching for meaning and healing. That was my turning point. From that moment on, faith became the foundation of everything I did.
My first pastor, Rev. Chris Okotie, played a pivotal role in shaping my spiritual journey. Under his teaching, I received the Word of God in its depth and entirety. I learned not just the importance of prayer, integrity, and trusting God, but also the values of hard work, discipline, and compassion. I will always be grateful for the strong biblical foundation we were given under his leadership. Like, anyone else, I have faced uncertainties, difficult decisions, and moments of self-doubt. But one thing has remained constant—my faith in God gives me direction, strength, and purpose. It has shaped my worldview, my choices, and my ability to overcome obstacles.
Faith is not just something I practice on Sundays; it is my way of life. It influences how I see people, how I treat others, and how I respond to life’s challenges. I have come to understand that God has a plan for my life, and when I align myself with His purpose, I find true fulfillment. This deep-rooted faith has helped me navigate every area of life—my education, my marriage, motherhood, career, and service to God. It has been my anchor through trials, transitions, and uncertainties. Beyond my personal journey, faith has fuelled my passion for helping others—especially women and young people—discover their own purpose and build strong, God-centred relationships and families. It has also shaped my work in counselling, corporate wellness, and mentorship. Faith is what drives me to serve, to teach, and to guide others toward lives of balance, wholeness, and fulfillment.
Each relationship does come with its challenges, at what point do you think one should leave a relationship?
Every relationship comes with its challenges, disagreements, and seasons of difficulty. However, there is a significant difference between normal relationship struggles and a toxic or destructive relationship. A person should seriously consider leaving when there is abuse of any kind—physical, emotional, verbal, financial, or psychological. Abuse is not just about bruises; constant belittling, manipulation, and control are equally damaging. No one should remain in an environment that threatens their safety, dignity, or mental health. A pattern of dishonesty and betrayal is another major red flag. Repeated infidelity, chronic lying, or secrecy can break trust beyond repair.
If a partner shows no remorse or effort to rebuild that trust, staying only leads to more pain.
Misalignment in core values and life goals can also make a relationship unsustainable. Differences in faith, values, vision for the future, or major life goals—such as children, career, or finances—can create constant conflict. If compromise isn’t possible and one person must sacrifice their dreams or identity to make the relationship work, it may be time to walk away. A relationship requires two willing participants. If all efforts to fix the relationship are continually one-sided, it creates an imbalance that leads to frustration and resentment. No one should have to carry the emotional weight of a relationship alone. A healthy relationship should help both people grow, not drain their emotional, spiritual, or mental energy. When there is no respect or emotional support, when a person constantly feels unheard, unsupported, or diminished, the relationship has become unhealthy. In such cases, leaving may be the only way to preserve one’s well-being.
What’s your advise to women looking to go into relationships or get married?
Entering a relationship or considering marriage is one of the most important decisions a woman will ever make. It’s about more than love and attraction—it’s about purpose, compatibility, and long-term commitment. Marriage is not just an emotional or physical journey; it is also a spiritual covenant. That is why you must build a strong relationship with God before marriage. Let prayer, biblical wisdom, and godly counsel guide your choice. Don’t rush ahead of God and His timing—the right person will align with His plan for your life.
Before joining your life with someone else, you must first know yourself. Understand who you are in God—your values, goals, strengths, weaknesses, and what truly makes you happy. Be convinced that you are emotionally, spiritually, and mentally ready for a relationship. Build confidence in your identity, purpose, and worth outside of a relationship. That becomes your strength and attracts the right people into your life. In preparing yourself, develop essential life skills that will support a healthy marriage. Emotional intelligence is critical—it helps you become self-aware and more sensitive to the moods and needs of those around you. Financial wisdom and independence are also important; bring financial value to the table rather than relying solely on your partner.
Communication skills are essential—practice patience, active listening, and healthy dialogue now, so that when the right person comes, you are ready to build a strong, open, and respectful relationship. Never ignore your peace or the lack of it! If something doesn’t feel right, don’t dismiss it. God often speaks through peace—or the absence of it. If you feel pressured, anxious, or confused, step back and pray for clarity. These feelings could arise even when nothing seems “technically” wrong. Marriage is a beautiful, God-ordained institution, but it is also a lifelong commitment that requires wisdom, preparation, and maturity. It should not be a rescue mission—you cannot change or “fix” a man who isn’t ready to be a godly husband. Marriage is about partnership, not perfection. Love alone is not enough—wisdom, mutual respect, and teamwork are key. Seek God first, know your worth, and choose wisely. When the right person comes, you will recognize a love that reflects peace, purpose, and God’s best for you.
