Gay marriage in Nigeria… bizarre union promoting tabooed behaviour

Despite the fact that the Same Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Act (SSMPA) 2013 prohibits Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer (LGBTQ) community and stipulates 14 years imprisonment for an offender, many Nigerian youths have been lured into the practice and clandestinely carry out their acts. In this report by OMIKO AWA, stakeholders give reasons for the surge in the practice and proffer suggestions on how to halt the distasteful trend.

Marriage, in Nigerian society, is a union between a man and a woman. In some cultures, the man has the licence to marry as many women as he wants provided he can maintain them. In fact, in such cultures, the more women the man marries, the higher the respect accorded to him. But the union must be approved by the community or society.

However, of late, the marriage institution has been infiltrated by different precepts that contravene the existing order. One of such precepts is gay marriage – a bizarre union in which a man marries another man or a woman marries another woman. It is considered a taboo in Nigerian cultures, and across the nation, there is no approval of gay marriage. The dominant religions in the country – Christianity, Islam and traditionalists –are also against gay marriage.

Nigerian society strictly narrows the definition of marriage to a union between or among members of the opposite sex; that is man and woman/women. It has no place for same-sex marriage of man and man or woman and woman copulation.

As strange as same-sex marriage is to various cultures and religions in Nigeria, the practice is stealthily searching for acceptability in the country. This is a result of behavioural patterns picked up from urbanisation and the enculturation of citizens as they mingle with people from other cultures.

Noticing that some Nigerians, especially those coming from abroad, were practising the act and encouraging others to join them, the Nigerian government in 2014 toed the steps of over 30 other African countries that had banned the unwholesome practice, a move the United Kingdom (UK) and the U.S. openly opposed.

The Same Sex Marriage (Prohibition) Act (SSMPA) of 2013 signed into law in 2014, apart from stiffening the already existing laws on same-sex marriages, specified 14 years imprisonment for any offender. It prohibits those who indulge in lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, transsexual, queer, intersex, asexual and pansexual relationships from carrying out their amorous acts, stipulating that it is distasteful to the Nigerian public and the culture of the Nigerian people.

The law categorically states: “A person who registers, operates or participates in gay clubs, societies or organisations, or directly or indirectly makes public show of same-sex amorous relationship in Nigeria commits an offence and is liable on conviction to a term of 10 years.”

In the northern part of the country where Sharia law is being observed, homosexuality or same-sex marriage attracts more and stiffer punishment – death – while those who perform, witness, aid or abet the act get severely punished. In June 2022, a Sharia court ruling sentenced three men to death by stoning for same-sex sexual acts in Bauchi State.

Although the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer (LGBTQ) communities within and outside the country have been calling for repeal of the law, saying it contravenes the fundamental rights of the adherents to associate and mingle with their kinds, the Federal Government has not budged. Also, steps taken by organisations like the Amnesty International to make the government change its stand on the issue have not yielded any positive result.

However, regardless of the law and its punitive provisions against gay practice, some people, mostly youth, are increasingly getting involved in it. Investigation by The Guardian revealed many adults and youths are practising gay marriage in secret in the country today.

Recently, the Delta State Command of the Nigeria Police arrested 67 suspects during an alleged gay wedding in a hotel in Uvwie Local Council area of the state. The State Police spokesman, Bright Edafe, said they would be prosecuted in line with the relevant laws.

In 2018, 47 men were arrested in Lagos for allegedly being initiated into a gay club. The men said they were attending a birthday party. The police in the same year also arrested 11 ladies in Lagos on the charges of planning a lesbian wedding, but the young women denied doing so, saying they were only celebrating the appointment of their dance club’s president.

In 2015, the Kano State Hisbah Corps (an agency that enforces Islamic religious morals) arrested 19 youths suspected to be planning a same-sex wedding. The men denied it, saying they were planning a friend’s birthday party. The then spokesman of the Hisbah, Malam Lawan Ibrahim, alleged that the youth gathered to witness the wedding of two suspected homosexuals, Abba and Mujahid.

In 2013, the police arrested two men, Emeka Eze aged 35 and Jonathan Akatin, 22, in Jos for a similar offence. The men were arraigned in an Upper Area Court, Jos.

Gradually, activities of same-sex marriage supporters are becoming rampant, undermining Nigeria’s cultural and moral foundation. Those involved in it go about it in a clandestine manner and always deny it when caught.

On the reasons this outlawed practice is surging, a sociologist and human development consultant, Opeyemi Olawale Owosibo, cited exposure to the Internet.

According to him, access to technology and information on the Internet has enabled adherents to connect to LGBTQ communities across the globe, get further information about gay activities and also bring in new members to their fold. He noted that this group does not only spread information, but also arm members with the necessary resources, including finance, to carry on their activities within the country.

The sociologist stated that the advocacy that comes from international communities, including human rights groups and foreign governments, have emboldened some people to defy existing state laws and congregate in public spaces under the guise of partying or even clubbing, to engage in pro-same-sex activities. To him, until this is stopped, adherents would continue to masquerade in one form of social group or the other to carry out their morally reprehensible activities. He called for proper scrutiny of the activities going on in some of the hotels in the country.

Owosibo also pointed accusing fingers at foreigners and some Nigerians who have lived where homosexuality is permitted, saying this group of people come into the country and lure some youths with juicy offers to be members.

“This can only stop when the government at all levels implement the same-sex law at all facets of society. Since former President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan signed the law prohibiting gay marriages in the country with appropriate punishment of between 10 and 14 years imprisonment on conviction, how many offenders have the police successfully tried and prosecuted? The police only end up carrying out public show of those arrested and, thereafter, release them on bail. This public show, and by extension the government’s lukewarm attitude, cannot stop gay marriages in the country. The law must be implemented to the letter to serve as a deterrent to others,” he stated.

Calling on the government at all levels to create the enabling environment for businesses to thrive and boost job creation, Owosibo revealed that the drive to live above poverty level in the country has pushed many youths into gay practice, adding that these youths and even matured men and women hurriedly give in when other adherents place before them huge sums of money, sometimes in hard currencies as incentives.

Owosibo stressed that some of the sociological impact of gay marriages on the Nigerian society could include social backlash and conflicts, which could trigger moral panic among individuals and groups who perceive homosexuality as a threat to their traditional values and norms.

According to the sociologist, this could manifest in the form of discrimination, stigmatisation and violence against LGBTQ communities, groups and individuals, which may lead to mayhem in communities. He said that same-sex marriage could also snowball into strained relations between religious institutions and the state, as religious bodies often oppose same-sex unions in the country. It can also create division within families, communities and social networks, as adherents may clash with people of different beliefs and values.

Highlighting the psychological impact of gay marriages on Nigerian communities, the Founder/Director General of the Centre for Research Information, Management and Media Development (CRIMMD), Dr. Raphael James, said the recent opinion poll carried out by his organisation revealed that gay marriages in the country was on the increase in the last 10 years, from seven per cent in 2012 to 23 per cent in 2022 and still rising.

According to him, the major causes of this increase include the rate at which some Nigerians return home from abroad, especially those from countries where gay marriage has been legalised. He noted that gay couples have higher identity concealment, vigilance and isolation and also suffer interpersonal stigma because the practice is not a norm in Nigerian society.

“The cultures of the various ethnic groups in Nigeria practice man-woman relationship and not man-man or woman-woman relationship. Probably, the only way we can help stop gay marriages is to bring the young ones closer to God; let them understand the fact that God created Adam and Eve and not Adam and Adam or Eve and Eve. If God had wanted man to do man, He would have fixed an extra vagina in men at creation.

“We must continue to protect our society from the influence of foreign cultures. The youth must also be guided on morals and values of the society. Family is the bedrock of the society, and family must stand up to their responsibilities and ensure that they inculcate proper values in their young ones. Also, society must be orientated to disorientate the minds of our youths from same-sex marriage,” he said.

The CRIMMD boss called on the various agencies to go into the nation’s tertiary institutions and training schools to create awareness about the dangers of the practice, adding that concerted efforts should be made to open campaigns against homosexuality and open dialogue with those involved in it. He called for awareness creation and sensitisation programmes on television, radio and newspapers on the danger of gay marriages.

For a social worker, Musilim Olamide, homosexuals have always existed but the extent to which the youth are now embracing it leaves much to be desired.

According to the Ibadan-based Olamide, gay used to be practised in a hush-hush manner because it is associated with evil.

“It is an abnormality for procreation and a distortion of the continuity of the human race. It is for this reason that anybody caught in the act is considered evil and is either ostracised in the community or killed,” he said.

Apart from foreign influence, Olamide said that lesbianism and gay habits could be picked up from the single gender school system because the students do not always have the avenue to properly interact with the opposite gender. He added that this could make them either misogynist (hater of women) or misandrist (hater of men) later in life. Olamide noted that young people that have developed this hatred would be susceptible to being engaged by LGBTQ communities because they will hate man-woman marriage and cling to their kind.

He urged the developers of various school curricula to create a situation where both genders can mingle in a healthy manner.

“In the past, homosexuality was found in some communities in the country. This practice was not done for the fun of it, but for money ritual. The current situation where youths are involved needs to be checked to save the coming generation.”

Olumide called on authorities concerned to cleanse the society of all forms habits and rot that could jeopardise the lives of the people, saying that accepting gay, lesbianism or homosexuality as a normal lifestyle would encourage the spread of viruses contacted from the anus and other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), including the Human Immuno-deficiency Virus (HIV) that causes the Acquired Immuno-deficiency Syndrome (AIDS).

For a youth mentor and school counsellor, Fred Akpesiri, many gay people have psychosis and identity crisis which they often want to transfer to others, especially the youth, in the process of trying to satisfy their urge.

“They entice some youths with promises that include they will be accepted for asylum in countries, especially the United Kingdom and United States, where the practice has been approved, among others. Some young ones have used this means to gain entry into these countries and are doing well. So, seeing them, some other youths would want to follow,” he said.

Akpesiri pointed out that adherents of same sex marriage, who still call each other as “wife” and “husband”, recognise the difference in both genders, but still choose to lead a hedonistic lifestyle, which, among other things, amount to self-deception because they are not telling themselves the truth.

“You could imagine the man-wife playing the artificial roles of a woman, which is the reason some do have ruptured anus. God has created man in the right order, but insatiable lust has led him to this. Our religious books made us understand that God had to destroy a city because of this act,” Akpesiri said.

On the reasons some youths are attracted to gay practice, he disclosed that they live a life of happy-go-lucky, drugs and lewd sex that often end in illness, madness and early death.

“Many of them are not ready to be responsible and keep children; they see having children as a means to tie them down. They do not want to carry the responsibility of training any child and could adopt one whenever they feel. Societies are not built this way because the Nigerian traditional family comprises the father (man), mother or mothers (women) and the children,” he explained.

On Amnesty International and other global organisations that always call for the release of homosexuals when arrested by law enforcement agents, Akpesiri said the government should shun them, adding that no strong nation anywhere in the world would fold its hands and allow outsiders to define its culture, especially when what they are supporting demeans the people and their society.