Wellness  

Self-care or selfishness: Where do you draw the line?

By Adenike Baderin

21 November 2024   |   10:58 am

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When we hear self-care, images of candle-lit baths, retail therapy, or luxurious getaways come to mind. But is that what it truly means? And where do we draw the line between self-care and selfishness? For some, self-care is thought of as a luxury—a reward to be indulged in when there’s time or extra money. But…

When we hear self-care, images of candle-lit baths, retail therapy, or luxurious getaways come to mind. But is that what it truly means? And where do we draw the line between self-care and selfishness?

For some, self-care is thought of as a luxury—a reward to be indulged in when there’s time or extra money. But it is more about maintaining mental, emotional, and physical health in the face of life’s constant demands—hectic schedules, responsibilities, and relationships can all trigger stress and burnout.

UNDERSTANDING SELF-CARE

Many of us face relentless demands from work, family, and social commitments, which can create overwhelming anxiety and mental strain. Robin Goldsbro, managing director of Level 7 coaching, defines self-care as replenishing one’s resources without depleting others’. In other words, it’s about nurturing ourselves so we can better show up as spouses, parents, employees, bosses, and friends.

Self-care does not mean:

• Neglecting responsibilities
• Prioritizing one’s self above other
• Indulging in expensive luxuries

Instead, it includes:

• Mindfulness practices
•  Journaling
• Connecting with nature
• Healthy boundaries
• Make sleep a priority
• Helping others out

READ ALSO: Do you know your skincare routine can improve your mental health?

THE KEY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN SELF-CARE AND SELFISHNESS

Dr. Stephanie Grunewald describes selfishness as a “me, me, me” mindset, while self-care involves openness to others, fulfilling personal needs, and finding joy. Selfishness isolates us from others, whereas self-care enables us to recharge so we can bring our best selves to our relationships and responsibilities.

On the contrary, self-care is in its name. It involves taking time to reset and renew our thoughts so we can apply ourselves to be more helpful in our home life and the people around us. It could mean watching your favorite YouTubers, enjoying quiet evenings,  going to the gym very early in the morning or denying oneself of harmful habits and practices, such as smoking or eating sweets excessively.

Psychologos Magazine—a mental health-focused publication reminds us that there must be a balance between caring for oneself and attending to others’ needs. It keeps our well-being a priority while maintaining healthy relationships. In contrast, selfishness makes us self-centered and affects our connections with loved ones.
Self-care is not selfishness; it’s essential for a balanced, healthy life. Prioritizing oneself makes us more resilient, compassionate, and productive.

Remember, taking care of yourself is not a luxury—it is a necessity.