Back at one
I was waiting for Chigozie to speak and tell me why exactly he had decided to cut me off completely. Knowing what I was going through; on my hospital bed and with my family. I wasn’t expecting any grand gestures like flowers or a diamond ring but considering all that had happened between us, the least he could have done was reach out.
“I’m waiting”. I said impatiently as he watched me.
“Are you really mad at me for not contacting you while you were in the hospital”? He asked “Considering that you witnessed the accident and caused it by upsetting me, a phone call from you was the least of my expectations”! I yelled at him. All the while I had thought I didn’t mind that I hadn’t heard from him but seeing him now opened a wound I didn’t even know I had been nursing.
“You are such an entitled diva!” Chigozie screamed back at me. “Are you aware your father had me detained for 48 hours. He intended to keep me there longer, but fortunately for me my sister was alerted and she got a lawyer who ensured I was released because there was no basis for my arrest in the first place! And you stand here judging me for not calling you because you sprained your pretty princess ankle”.
“I did not sprain my ankle! My leg was in a cast for weeks! And for what it is worth, immediately I found out you had been detained I insisted you be released immediately, because I care about you and because I have a conscience which is something you clearly lack”. I retorted.
“Wow…I was told the issue with your leg was minor. I had no idea you had a cast on. I am sorry”. Chigozie said looking contrite.
“And I had no idea you were in detention for more than a few hours. I am sorry too”. I said feeling a little silly.We looked at each other and we both laughed.
“So you were going to tell me something about my father”. I reminded him. He shoved his hands into his pocket and shook his head.
“Look, I don’t think it’s a good idea. You are his only daughter and he was simply trying to protect you. I don’t want to cause you more problems than I already have”. He said.
“You know I’m not going to let this go. You are better off just telling me as it is so we can discuss it and find a way forward.” I was determined to hear whatever it was he had to say.
“Ok. So your dad came to visit me in detention just before I was released. He basically told me if he ever heard I had tried to contact you, he’d have me right back there…behind bars. It was a very long conversation about his plans for you and the kind of man you need. He seemed certain that with your fiancé Tunji you would have the kind of life he had always envisaged for you. But with me, you’d live as he called it “a very average, unmemorable and uneventful life”. I could have argued with him but I knew he was right. You have so much potential and I don’t want you wasting it because of whatever we think we feel or felt for each other at some point. That was why I didn’t reach out. I was doing the right thing, I thought your head would be full of conflicting thoughts and I didn’t want my presence and the drama with your family confusing and depressing you”. I could tell he was being sincere.
“So why did you agree to meet with Tosin my friend, if you knew there was no pointing messing with my head”? I asked.“Adesewa, you know your friend! She has been on my case constantly telling me about how I need to man up and rescue you from yourself. I think she has this idea that there is a great love story here and we shouldn’t let people come in between us. I met her here today out of courtesy, I don’t want to ruin your life Adesewa.” He said reaching out to touch my arm.
I stepped away from his reach. I was surprised at my action and till now I cannot explain why I reacted that way.He was also surprised and I could see the pain register on his face. After what seemed like eternity but indeed couldn’t have been more than a few seconds, he spoke.
“I’m really glad I ran into you Adesewa. I’m glad you are fine and I wish you all the best in the future”. With that, he walked away and left me standing there wondering why I didn’t try to stop him.And so it was official. I had lost my fiancé and the man who had been a source of confusion to me for months.
As I watched him leave, I smiled. For the first time in my adult life I was alone and even though my heart was breaking, I knew it was a journey I had to go on. A journey that would lead me back to one of them but only time could tell which one.