Love that sustains a Godly family – Part 2

The Ephesian brethren were gentiles and did not know godliness or righteousness before they came to the Lord. Besides, there was no exemplary family or marriage in the gentile world. Therefore, the only example and pattern Apostle Paul could refer them to is, “Christ (who) loved the church, and gave himself for it.” We be one unscriptural and make a great, mistake when we compare our marriage with our parents.’ Our ultimate model is Christ, the Lord. He loves the Church, not with a temporary affection, but on an ongoing basis — eternal, unbreakable love. Like Him, husbands and wives must love each other, “as their own bodies,” and must show proper expression of love in the family.

Love in the family is not theoretical, theological or doctrinal. It is practical. Our love in the family must be expressed properly. If we have this practical love, it will be affirmed, recognised, visible and demonstrated: “For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church.”

Couples should not always run to their parents, elders or pastors in the church whenever there is an issue in the family. A level of maturity should come with being married. You are expected to manage your family situations by yourselves, and ensure there is permanent existence of love in the family.
This is the desire of Christ for our families. The scripture teaches that the husband and the wife “shall be one flesh;” joined, existing and living together in love until death parts them. In response to the Pharisees’ question whether it was right to put away one’s wife for every cause, Jesus did not ask if they had heard what the ruler of the Jews, the philosophers and present-day authors had said about marriage. Rather, He gave them the scripture’s standard. It is such a precept that will ensure that there is pleasant edification through love in the family.

As we bond in the family and exercise the love we ought to have, the husband and wife must play their respective part to make the family stay together. By this, we fulfill God’s will and there is edification in the family through the love that every joint supplies. Through the grace, goodness and pleasure of the Lord, our lives could be literally “as the days of heaven upon the earth.”

“And walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet smelling savour.” Christ has given us a perfect example of what our fellowship ought to be in the family and the church. Following the model of Christ’s sacrificial love in our fellowship will make us work for the success of our marriage or family. The key is for us to always think about what to give to our partner, children and parents instead of concentrating on what we can get from them. And when we give, we must do so with our heart. To manifest sacrificial love, we must “walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling savour.”

In everything we do in the family, Christ’s supreme love must be present. He commands that we love one another. “This is my commandment, that ye love one another, as I have loved you.”He expects us to clear all offences, misconceptions and injuries of the past from our mind. We must learn to forgive and forget so that love would be at the centre of our marriage. Despite Peter’s denial of Christ, He still forgave him. As He forgave, so we must also forgive those that offend us. In the end, the Lord shows us that it is essential for us to possess Christ’s sufficient love in all fullness.

When we come to Christ, we receive of His fullness. “And of his fullness have all we received, and grace for grace.” Just as we have benefitted from the Lord, we also, being united, should meet the needs of one another. If we do that, our families will be a bastion of joy, peace and gladness. It will become a model for others to emulate.
• Further Reading (King James Version): Ephesians 5:25-33; Hebrews 13:4; Luke 20:34-36; Matthew 24:36-39; Revelation 19:7-9; Ephesians 5:5-7; Revelation 21:8; 22:12-15. Ephesians 5:25-28; Jude 1:21.