Ten excuses top executives give about their emotional and mental health – Part 1

As we prepare to host leaders for Dr. Abiola Salami International Leadership Bootcamp in Mombasa, Kenya in June 2024, we consider it important to discuss Emotional and Mental Health (EMH) in leadership this month of May. We started the month by discussing 10 Warning Signs A Leader’s Emotional & Mental Health Might Be At Great Risk. Today, we conclude the discussion with Part 2 of 10 Excuses Top Executives Give About Their Emotional & Mental Health

Excuse #5 – This Is Just The Way I Am
Humans are generally resistant to change even though we talk about it a lot. Many people have adjusted to their traumas and have seemingly built a coping mechanism around such nasty experiences. Seeking professional help for such traumas that have messed up their emotional and mental health for so long would mean, taking off the masks and faux personalities they have carefully built over the years and come face to face with the root of their pain. That’s too much for some top executives, they would rather continue with their lives than deconstruct those layers of alter egos and heal into their authentic selves – hence the lame excuse, “this is just the way I am”. Others are scared to find out who they could become on the other side of getting professional help; they prefer the familiar to the possible.

Excuse #6 – Everybody Does This
Another excuse bothers on the fallacy of generalization and is usually used in corporate environments where toxicity is entrenched, accepted and a staple. In essence, the ecosystem rewards such bad behaviour that there is no incentive to unlearn it. For example, many top executives don’t see bullying their colleagues from the perspective of having an emotional and mental health challenge because what bullying really speaks to is a lack of a healthy self-image or self-esteem but masked by aggressive behaviour towards others. They rather explain it away by saying that it is how people survive in a space that is akin to a shark-infested water – hence, the best form of defence is attack. Such top executives find solace in the fact that the society is seemingly indifference to their untoward behaviour; so the absence of sanctions or consequences makes them double down on their dysfunctions.

Excuse #7 – It’s Not That Bad
This excuse comes from a perspective of cognitive dissonance and intellectual dishonesty. It’s an attempt by top executives to gaslight people by downplaying the gravity of their emotional and mental health challenges. This view is prejudiced especially coming from business executives because judging by the power dynamics within an organization, they are usually high up the totem pole – which means that there are fewer voices that can challenge such people on the negative impact of their actions on others. It’s very rare to see employees on a much lower cadre, stand up to someone in top management. Even the Human Resource Manager who should be the port of call for those who seek redress are more disposed to protecting their personal interests than ensuring the right thing is down – the lack of moderating influences for top executives eventually hurts them.

Excuse #8 – I Can Handle It On My Own
This excuse bothers on self-help. Here a top executive believes that he or she can apply DIY-solutions to their emotional and mental health challenges. This excuse is underpinned by expertise in other areas of their lives especially their professional endeavours. These top managers extrapolate success in one or more areas of their lives and use such as metric for determining their ability to solve problems in other areas of their lives. In doing so, they underplay the level of skill that is used by professionals to manage emotional and mental health challenges. It takes a level of respect to acknowledge that just as you are an expert in a particular area of life, someone else is also an expert in another area of life.

Excuse #9 – I Don’t Talk About My Issues To Strangers
For top executives, they are within their rights to be concerned about how much personal information can be shared with third-parties because owing to their being at the helm of affairs, such information could be weaponized by their rivals and used for a smear campaign which could hurt the fortunes of their organization very quickly. However, a simple solution to this is the involvement of legal counsels who will adopt memorandum of understandings, non-disclosure agreements and confidentiality clauses that protects the executive. There is no guarantee that even with familiar faces, personal information would be safe – so seeking professional help for mental health challenges is certainly worth the risks.

Excuse #10 – All I Need Is God
The overly religious executives who hold extreme views about their faith don’t believe that there is anything wrong with them and to engage in therapy would be to imply that a perfect God didn’t create a perfect human. This puritan view downplays the effectiveness of intervention. Some extreme views even reject interventions such as accepting blood transfusions, taking medications, or engaging in therapy. These top executives embrace a perception of divinity that signifies that “man-made” solutions demean their spirituality. This notion is misguided because first, the very definition of human implies to be imperfect and most of the solutions to human problems were discovered by those who took time to study what God created. For example, people were inspired to create the aeroplane from studying the science of how birds fly in the sky, it only presupposes that God can use people to help other people.

Growth Opportunities
To further position your leaders for peak performance, you can download a free copy of the latest edition of The Peak Performer Magazine You can also enrol your Mid-level Leadership Team for the Made4More Accelerator Program and your Senior Leadership Team for the Dr. Abiola Salami International Leadership Bootcamp MOMBASA 2024 We also have an upcoming training for leaders in public service.

About Dr. Abiola Salami
Dr. Abiola Salami is the Convener of Dr Abiola Salami International Leadership Bootcamp and The Peak PerformerTM. He is the Principal Performance Strategist at CHAMP – a full scale professional services firm trusted by high performing business leaders for providing Executive Coaching, Workforce Development & Advisory Services to improve performance. You can reach his team on [email protected] and connect with him @abiolachamp on all social media platforms.