The economics of love: Navigating romance amidst financial strains

Amidst soaring prices and economic challenges, Nigerian couples are discovering that the essence of love is not about lavish spending but the quiet strength of partnership, the beauty of simplicity, and the unwavering commitment to navigate life’s uncertainties together.

Amid the clamour of busy streets and the energy of bustling markets, one can’t help but wonder: how do couples manage to keep their relationships thriving when every naira counts? With the cost of living seemingly rising each new day, modern romance in Nigeria is undergoing a quiet transformation, one that demands both creativity and realistic planning.

A new economic reality

Nigeria’s economy has been worsening over the past few years, with persistent price hikes affecting even the most basic necessities. Recent data from the National Bureau of Statistics show that the headline inflation rate in Nigeria edged up from 34.60% in November to 34.80% in December. For many households, these figures aren’t just numbers; they represent a daily challenge to meet essential needs.

According to a market survey by SBM Intelligence’s Jollof Index—which tracks food inflation in the country—the cost of making a pot of jollof rice, one of Nigeria’s most popular dishes, for a family of five surged by 8% in December, reaching ₦75,000 from the previous month. In Lagos, a 50-kilogram bag of rice—the key ingredient for this cherished dish—has seen an 8% jump, while prices in Abuja have soared even higher, reaching ₦99,000. Such increases highlight a broader cost-of-living crisis that is forcing families to rethink every expenditure.

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“The current economic climate in Nigeria is in a state of continuous regression, with unfavourable and unstable exchange rates, high inflation, and currency deterioration,” explains Oladele Yusuf, a financial analyst at Alternative Investments. “This impacts household budgets by driving expenses higher than budgeted while reducing purchasing power.”

Senior Audit Associate Oluchi Nwaka at Adegbite Adeyemo & Co. adds, “The current economic climate negatively impacts household budgets. Families now have to draft their budgets based on needs and necessities rather than wants. The loss of purchasing power has strained incomes, leaving couples with little or no savings, which in turn leads to emotional breakdown and mental stress that ultimately affects family well-being and relationships.”

For couples, these economic shifts aren’t limited to grocery bills or utility payments—they affect every facet of their lives. Financial planning has moved from a luxury to a necessity, and the pressure is felt acutely in relationships where desires and daily realities collide.
“There’s a constant tug-of-war between our dreams and our means,” says Ifeoma, a 32-year-old marketing executive from Lagos. “Even small gestures—like a dinner out or a weekend getaway—now require careful planning and sometimes, painful compromises.”

Love on a budget

With inflation eroding disposable income, love is no longer measured largely by extravagant dates or lavish celebrations. Instead, it’s becoming a game of creativity and resourcefulness. Across Nigeria, couples are reimagining how to celebrate their love without overspending. “We now mark our anniversaries with a picnic in the park and a home-cooked meal,” say Tunde and Anita, an Abuja-based couple. “It’s not about the money spent but the thought and effort we put into it.” Their approach reflects a broader trend of scaling back on opulence in favour of intimate, meaningful moments.

Yet, not every romantic endeavour is free of compromise. Financial constraints force many couples to re-examine what commitment truly means, prompting both introspection and innovative solutions.

A seasoned wedding planner, Uche Nwankwo, observes that there’s been a noticeable drop in spending on weddings over the past two years. According to her, more couples are choosing minimalist celebrations that reflect their current financial realities rather than sticking to “outdated notions of what a wedding should be.” Evidently, this move towards simplicity not only alleviates stress but also redefines what it means to celebrate a union in today’s world.

Chima, a 29-year-old engineer from Port Harcourt, recalls the hard decisions he had to make when planning his wedding. “Our wedding plans had to be drastically scaled down,” he tells Guardian Life. “We initially wanted a lavish celebration, but when we saw the budget, we had to have a hard conversation about priorities and compromise and stick to what truly mattered to us.”

Bridging heart and wallet

As relationships navigate these turbulent economic waters, experts stress the importance of open discussions about money. Marriage counsellors tell Guardian Life that money-related stress can often amplify underlying issues in a relationship.

Dr Ayo Adeyemi, who has spent over ten years guiding couples through such challenges, explains, “Financial pressures tend to bring unresolved issues to the surface. When couples find that they can no longer afford the lifestyle they once dreamed of, discussions about money often escalate into deeper emotional conflicts.”

Pastor Damilola Florence Oladokun, a marriage counsellor with over seven years of experience, echoes similar sentiments. “Some couples struggle with managing joint accounts, especially when one partner tends to spend lavishly or on items that don’t benefit the relationship,” she observes.

“When income doesn’t match expenditure, it creates a strain that can lead to emotional stress and even less communication. My advice is simple: understand your income, plan ahead, and avoid unnecessary extravagance—be it excessive aso ebi or debt incurred for a big wedding.”

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Ojonimi Ojotule, who is a marriage counsellor, relationship coach, and the founder and President of Happy Family Ministries International, reinforces this view, noting that, “Next to infidelity, the next source of a marital crisis in marriages currently is financial problems, financial pressures.”

“The truth is that money, even the Bible says, ‘money answers all things’,” continues Ojotule. “As humans, our emotions follow our thoughts. When your thought system is affected by a lack of money, it affects your emotions, your communication, and ultimately, how you relate to one another.”

Tradition vs modern realities

Traditional markers of romance in Nigeria—lavish weddings, generous dowries, expensive gifts, and lavish ceremonies—have long been a source of pride and status. Yet, as financial pressures intensify, these customs are being re-examined.

There’s a generational shift underway, experts say. Many young couples today are less willing to adhere to models that require extravagant spending, especially when such spending does not reflect the true essence of their commitment.

The pressure to uphold these traditions often intensifies financial stress, leading families to reconsider what truly matters in a marriage.

As Ojonimi Ojotule puts it, “One major challenge could be the traditional mindset that a man shouldn’t disclose everything he earns to his wife.”
This mentality often prevents transparency and exacerbates financial tensions within relationships.

Strategies and solutions

Despite the challenges, experts offer a multi-faceted approach to nurturing love in a tight economy, one that combines proactive financial planning, open and honest communication, and a willingness to adapt traditional practices to modern realities.
Things like having a joint budget, embracing minimalist celebrations, prioritising open communication, redefining cultural expectations, and learning from lived experiences are ways couples can learn to navigate the harsh economic realities we face today as well as the rising cost of living while maintaining a strong bond.

For one, establishing a joint budget helps create a shared vision for the future. When couples set aside time to review their finances together, they’re not just managing money; they’re building a partnership based on trust and mutual responsibility. This collective approach transforms budgeting from a source of stress into an opportunity for teamwork.
Adaeze Okonkwo, a financial planner based in Lagos, advises, “Couples should view their finances as a shared resource. Budgeting together isn’t about restricting romance; it ensures that love remains sustainable amid economic hardship.”

By setting up a joint budget and reviewing expenses regularly, couples can turn money management from a potential source of conflict into a shared goal that builds a solid foundation for the future.

Open communication is also crucial. In addition, couples today are finding that intimate, minimalist celebrations are often more meaningful than grand, extravagant events. Beyond being a cost-saving measure, the trend towards simpler celebrations is a conscious redefinition of what matters.

By focusing on their commitment rather than on external displays of wealth, they can celebrate their love in a way that truly reflects their values without succumbing to the pressure of societal expectations.

“Couples should set aside dedicated time to discuss their financial situation openly. This will help in understanding each other’s perspectives and making joint decisions that benefit the relationship,” Dr Adeyemi says.

Ojotule advises further, “Marriage is a lifetime decision. And if you decide to get married, there’s no reason to hide your finances. If a man is under financial pressure, let his wife know; if a wife is facing challenges, she should open up to her husband. Concealment only complicates things.”

He also reminds couples, “You trying to worry will not solve any financial pressure in your family. There’s never been a case where couples worried and then money came in. And you must not think that you need money to be happy in your relationship.”

Real-life insights offer practical wisdom into how couples are navigating these challenges. Mrs. Ruth Pius, a married banker, shares her experience: “As an aspiring young couple, we always dreamed of a big wedding. But with inflation, we had to make compromises. For example, our planned honeymoon to Port Harcourt was replaced by a more modest getaway. We focus on saving, avoiding unnecessary debt, and ensuring we never neglect each other’s needs. Communication is key—don’t assume your partner automatically knows your needs; speak up when you can.”

Love beyond the price tag

Modern Nigerian love is not about grand gestures or extravagant spending. The true cost of love is not measured solely in currency; it’s about finding balance in the midst of economic uncertainty, about embracing simplicity while still cherishing the deep emotional bonds that make a relationship meaningful. It is gauged by the courage to adapt, the willingness to share burdens, and the depth of commitment that transforms adversity into opportunity.

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“Financial stress has its challenges, but it also brings an opportunity to focus on what really matters—our connection with one another,” Ifeoma says. “We’re learning that love isn’t defined by how much we spend but by how deeply we care and support each other through tough times.”

As couples adapt to a world where every naira counts, they are writing a new story of romance—one that values resilience, creativity, and above all, the commitment to stand together.